Fresh Scoop

Spiritual Parenting Class ~ Week 1

2012-03-07T21:02:00.001-08:00

Life aspects I'm passionate about are plentiful.

Lip gloss.

A new read.

Having friends over for dinner.

Baking cookies, then eating them directly out of the oven~ doughy and gooey, leaving chocolate chip strings all over my mouth.

A curly hair product that actually works, without leaving crunchy leaves in my do!

Those are some of the frivolous things.

Serious passions, those that leave lasting fingerprints are ~

Being lovingly called-to-the-carpet by my hubby about a personal growth opportunity.

Watching my son apologize because of his heart, not because he was told to.

Experiencing answered prayers.

Seeing hearts softened by the Holy Spirit.

But, there are few things that get me more jazzed, more piping passionate, and pull at my heartstrings like no other, than the topic of parenting.

No, not the

Do you use organic milk?

or

Oh, you spank?

type of parenting.

But the gut-honest-raw-vulnerable-I'm-trying-to-survive-each-day-and-raise-these-lil'-buggers-to- know-God-and-love-people parenting.

That's when my passion level is at an all-time high.

Which is why I'm beyond freakin' excited about the next six weeks, as Bryan and I take the Spiritual Parenting Class at our church. Spiritual Parenting. Facilitated by staff, and taught by author, Michelle Anthony, in video format, I know we are in for pivotal, parenting wisdom.

If you've got the parenting thing dialed in, good for you! You deserve a big gold star!

As for me, I need all the help I can get~ all the prayer friends can send up, endless mugs of caffeine, and a life-time supply of Kleenex for tears already, and yet-to-be shed.

It's super hard, this parenting thing.
Unlike kids that are placed on Pre-School waiting lists long before they are even born, I was on the Spiritual Parenting Class waiting list before the book was written!

So grab some tea, give yourself a big fat pat on the back, and allow me to share the weekly highlights from the Spiritual Parenting Class.

~ Obviously as spiritual parents, we want to raise awesome, Christian people.
With great intentions, we often sprinkle them with a little Jesus talk, hope their Sunday School teachers do the rest, and pray!
As parents, it is our responsibility to teach our kids about faith. The family is God's best plan for teaching faith.

~ And what is faith?
Belief in the unseen, a personal surrender, and a transformed life. If all three ain't happenin' it ain't faith!

~ Spiritual Parenting is not perfect parenting!
Phew, this was good to hear, since I'm quite far from perfection.

~ God is my only audience! In a culture that compares everything and everyone, I can't measure myself to another parent, nor my kids to other kids.
This one especially pricked at my heart. I can't say how many times I look at other moms that appear to have it all together, or their lil' angels appear like... lil' angels, and my brain starts the downward comparison spiral. 'God is my only audience' is the newest tattoo etched on my heart.

~ The goal of Spiritual Parenting is to give God His place as first in charge. Bryan and I get to come alongside Him, and create a home environment for our kiddos to rely on the Holy Spirit. It's not about managing behavior, and creating polite and moral kids {even though that is a good thing}, but passing on a vibrant, transforming faith to our kids! A faith in which they would hear God's voice, obey His voice, and rely on the Holy Spirit {not themselves} to obey.

Practically, this is seen in the everyday. In the conversations I have with them as we clean up toys, go on walks, as I discipline, and when I encourage my boys to listen for the zillionth time. If I remember that God is redeeming every moment to create transforming faith in my kids, I'll sure as heck take advantage and view everyday concepts as teachable moments!

Michelle shared a cool illustration of a faith continuum, with the left side being parents that protect their kids from "the world" by only letting them hang out with other Christians, attend church activities, and "act good." On the far right, are the parents who let their kids jump into "the world" and figure it out as they go.

The left spectrum can easily concentrate on what our kids "don't do"~
well, they don't smoke, or drink, or blah blah blah...

But what if instead of concentrating on what our kids don't do, their good deeds separate them from the world? After all, we are to be in the world, not of the world. We want to raise kids that go boldly into the world with a vibrant, authentic faith!

This point was tidal wave huge to me. I strive to raise polite, obedient children, but unless their hearts are transformed by the Holy Spirit, I'm simply managing their behavior, as opposed to encouraging them to live a full life of faith, not fear!

~ Another highlight specifically struck a heartstring with my hubby, and involved how we relate with our kids.
As they get older {especially with boys}, yes, we can keep the computer in the living room, barbwire it with filters, and instruct them to
Not. look. at. porn.

Or, we can have a conversation with them. About how real the struggle is. About, how as parents, we struggle with our own sin issues {whatever that be}. We reach our children on their level, and share the messiness of our own faith. This not only creates a safe place in us as parents, but it proves we are not perfect, that we have our own struggles, and we too, rely on the Holy Spirit.

Bryan and I want our boys to talk with us. Share with us. We realize at some point we won't be cool. What? you ask, how this can be possible with all the dance parties and ice cream you eat?

But we know that day will inevitably come. Our prayer is that by sharing our faith journey with our kids, our own struggles and strengths, that hopefully they'll be more apt to talk with us about the deeper issues. Together with the Holy Spirit, we can be a family that exudes vibrant faith!

There you have it ~ highlights from our first Spiritual Parenting Class. Stay tuned for the next five weeks.

The Grass Will Be Even Greener ~ Reese's Shower

2012-03-04T23:38:00.001-08:00

There's nothing quite like a baby girl.

And Reese will be no exception!

Reese, who's Reese?

She's the future President, or rockstar teacher, or professional volleyball player, who is yet to be born.

Key word being yet.

Any day, this world will be forever changed by the

spunky, life-lovin', lil' girl my brother and sis-n-law will have!

No doubt, she will steal their hearts {and ours}

In honor of this sweet munch, we threw the parents-to-be a coed baby shower

and had a stinkin' blast!

When trying to come up with a baby shower theme, the thought that continued to resurface was

fresh

hmmm... what's fresh?

Grass, yes, grass!

Thus the vision for Reese's Baby Shower was conceived ~

The grass will be even greener with Reese in our lives!

As guests arrived, they were greeted by the painted window, and watering can overflowing with wheat grass

{I use windows for all my parties and events~ they are easy to personalize, and offer a creative alternative to paper signs}

Being that it was a Backyard BBQ Baby Shower, we couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day!

The food table was set up on my chalkboard painted table, flanked by two vintage doors on either side.

The theme of the day!

I strung Pom Yarn on the doors

{served both as decor, and held the personalized tags made by guests}

Can you handle this yarn? I'm obsessed!

I used this all over the shower, and it will be a staple for future events!

You can find it at Michael's and it comes in a variety of colors...

A wheat grass-filled tin served as the focal point of the table.

To offer height, I sat it on an upside-down crate.

Thought this lil' saying was cute!

A tag station was available for guests to share their favorite family traditions, prayer, advice, and words of encouragement for the parents-to-be.

The circles were cut from cardstock {nursery colors are gray, white, and coral}

and nestled in sweet potato fry holders! Tiny clothespins hung the tags on the yarn-strung door.

Wishes for baby cozied in a coral mug, and were hung with the other personalized tags.

{I found this adorable free download here}

An up-close of the hanging tags

Japanese parasol fabric {found at JoAnn's Fabrics} was made into overlays for the gift and dessert table. The colors bring out the coral of Reese's room

If I can brag about one thing, it's my hubby's BBQ skills ~ the man can grill a mean tri-tip!

Lunch was a nod to our Central Coast days of Tri-Trip {grilled over apple wood chip and natural coals}, Marinated, barbecued chicken

Firestone salad {mixed greens, sweet peppers, tomatoes, feta cheese, and pine nuts}

Toasted bread {doused in butter and flavored with garlic salt}

Fruit skewers {lovingly made by some of Jen's sweet friends. Thanks Erica and Stace!}

Wish you could smell it right about now, huh?!

After lunch, Drew and Jen represented their gender with a friendly game of baby trivia.

Did you know the one body part a baby is born without, is their kneecaps? Yep!

The winners won first in line at the dessert table ~ a BIG deal at the Pogue household!

The Strawberry Shortcake Bar let each guest build their own dessert.

The menu ~ cubed pound cake, fresh strawberries, homemade whipped cream, and white and milk chocolate shavings!

De-lish!

Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture of the dessert on the table, but you can thank me for not making your mouth water :)

A chalkboard sign {perched on a small footstool} displays the menu. Half-pint mason jars are stacked in a white, two-tiered wire basket, and lined up on a tray.

Uncle Doo will soon be Daddy Drew!

Ty dancin' to some Adam Levine!

Brother-in-laws doing what they do best... laugh!

All. The. Time!

Pops enjoying the party with Ty Ty

Mimi and Pops can't wait to meet their third grandbaby, Reese!

Oh, the PINK!

Look closely~ Erin, a friend of Jen's, knit this blanket, and the babies name is stitched at the bottom.

Really? TOO CUTE!!!

Ty, enjoying the view on Mimi's lap

As guests left, they took home a packet of flower seeds ~

a reminder to pray for Drew, Jen, and Reese as their family, and the flower grows!

The next time you see this cute couple, they'll have a sweet munch in their arms!

And yes,

The grass will definitely be greener with Reese in our lives!

Words not said {enough}

2012-02-13T15:02:00.000-08:00

Bryan's Grandma Snyder, affectionately nicknamed Geegee {short for great-grandma} is a trooper. At 89, she lives by herself, intentionally loves and blesses countless people, works part-time, knows more than I ever will, and is
just
plain
great!
And we've all decided she'll be around forever.

A couple of weeks ago she started experiencing extreme pain, which temporarily landed her in a place where help is available 24/7, if needed. Her stay won't be long, the goal being to get her back on her feet. After all, she will be around forever!

Sunday, the boys and I were making Valentine's Cards for grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and most importantly, their daddy.
There was a lot of red finger paint.
Paper heart cut-outs.
Glue.
Definitely twine.
And more hearts.

Our family phrase was scribbled across the boys heart-shaped handprints~ YOU make our hearts smile! It was the perfect afternoon craft sesh, until Tanner
fell
off
the chair
and
landed
on
his head!

For a moment, he laid still
and then his face shook,
his eyes rolled,
and he screamed.

At first, I thought he broke his arm,
or was having a seizure,
but really, he hit his head so hard, it took him a moment to come to.

After crying {a really good sign after hitting one's head}, I snuggled with him, offered him every treat under the sun, and spent the rest of the day and evening
eyeing him,
observing him,
invisibly wrapping garbage-truck-size bubble wrap around him.

No big! Just bubble wrap him for life so he can't fall off chairs anymore,
or get hurt playing soccer,
or worse yet, get his heart broken.

In the same breath, I want to push my boys towards life,
towards uncomfortable,
new,
scary,
and in the next sigh,
I want to pull them on my lap
and breathe them in,
and wrap my arms around their small frames,
and pray protection over their fragile, yet resilient bodies and minds.

But I know they'll be around forever!

Two years ago, my dad was diagnosed with kidney cancer.
My strong, easy-going, piano-playing, smiley dad.
One kidney later, he is cancer free!
We couldn't be more grateful!
His routine check-ups prove good news,
until this morning.
When my mom called to say the doctor wants to see them regarding last week's tests.

Gulp.
That's weird, 'cuz he is going to be around forever!

But forever
may not be my definition.

You see, none of us are promised tomorrow.
Even though I live like it.

I think about Grandma, but don't act on calling.

I shut the door, after tucking my boys in for the night, and wonder,
did I hug them today, did I look them in their blue eyes, and tell them that I'm crazy about them?

I intentionally parent, beautifully affected by the kind of grandpa my dad is, but have I told him?

Forever, I fear, is grasping air.

So many words not said {enough}

Words I want to share, need to share,
before I'm sitting by my grandma's assisted living bed,
holding my son's hand in the hospital
staring at the truth in my dad's eyes.

Your heart is beautiful. God shines through all you do, and your fear of Him makes you a force to be reckoned with. Your generosity and care for others inspires me.
You are our Geegee.

Watching you both run up and down the hallway, ducking in doorways, giggling, only to run off again, makes my heart smile daily. Your individual gifts of compassion, bravery, love for detail, and concern for people, make you a gift to all.
A gift, especially to your mom.
You are my Tanner and Ty Ty.

Your intentionality for fewer words, stirs me to lean in and listen, not wanting to miss a word. I watch you take life in strides and flavor it with grace and laughter.
Our boys love their Pops because you get down on their level to
wrestle,
read,
listen, and
love them ~
on the ground level, where all purposeful memories are made.
You are my dad.

And I realize this forever nonsense is grasping air.

So I'm saying the words not said {enough}

Bloody noses, breakfast, and bedtime!

2012-02-05T23:14:00.000-08:00

Whenever the weather gets dry, my oldest gets the bloody nose boogies {not to be confused with
'Bad News Bears'}.

Poor thing, he wanders down the hall, his shirt shoved up his nostrils in a makeshift Kleenex, my high school memories rushing back to when the wrestlers would shove tampons up their nostrils after an unfortunate match.
It turns into a game of how fast we can de-shirt him, stop the bloody nose {he's happy at this point because he just go out of napping for a legit reason}and show him my mommy magic at getting the bloodstains off his white Grom T-shirt.

Mom, how'd you'd do that?

I'm magic, son. That's why! Don't mess!

Tanner is continually amazed at my ability to resurrect his shirts and make them new. If I'm honest, I am too, but apparently Spray-N-Wash is the Magic Eraser of laundry stain removers.
Still, don't mess!

I know my life theme song is intentionality.

Intentional time with my husband.
Playing with my boys.
Spending time in God's Word.

But don't think for a minute, I've got it dialed in.

Allow me to paint a beautiful picture of today {you already know there were bloody noses involved}

My cheerful hubby was out the door at an ungodly hour for a Sunday morning. Okay, so it was only 8:30am but the magic coffee maker hadn't poured it's black liquid into my aqua and yellow Anthropologie mug, completed with vanilla creamer, so it seemed like an ungodly hour.

I swear when I looked in the mirror, five age spots had surfaced overnight.

Ty wanted to be held the entire morning, except for the 8 seconds he was sitting in his highchair, cramming five scrambled eggs, two slices of toast, and 1 ginormous bowl of blueberries into his piehole. I'm convinced he has nightmares in which every meal is his last, and he's come to believe it.
So I had a clingy monster on me...

And Tanner was super tired from our late escapade the night before.

The night before... it had been precious!

He had taken a later afternoon nap {and the fact that he had napped, was worth celebrating.} At 3 1/2, Tanner still lays down every afternoon, and while occasionally he snoozes, more often than not, I peek in to see Woody getting demolished by Buzz, while dinosaurs and Bumblebee Bot look on, innocent bystanders!

Yesterday, had been successful Tanner Time, resulting in a nap, so it came as no surprise when the clock struck 7:00pm {bedtime}, and it was obvious the kid was not yet tired.

I saw an intentional opportunity to make a fun memory and took it.
While I got ready for bed {Bry was at the store, grabbing must-have snacks for the Superbowl game the next day} Tanner got to lay in our bed and wrap himself in our sheets.
The two of us snuggled together, his small hand holding mine, rubbing the back of my thumb, back and forth, over and over, until he fell asleep. When his little breaths became heavy, my hubby carried him to his own bed.
It was a sweet moment, mostly because I can't remember the last time he'd slept in our bed, and partly because I'm sure there won't be too many more. After all, my sweet boys will be 20 and 18 in a blink!

Fast-forward to today, with tired Tanner, clingy Ty-Ty, bloody noses, no coffee, and the humor in my desire for intentional moments, when some days, really just turn into survival hours.

And that's okay, it's life, and while it's scattered with the unknown, the ones that rest in my heart as I drift to dreamland, are watching Ty dance in his highchair {yes, he paused long enough from eating}and shimmied his little booty to Madonna's half-time show, falling asleep with Tanner, reading a love note Bry wrote me on a bedroom frame, eating homemade killer salsa, and feeling thankful that my life is, intentionally normal.

Bloody noses and all!

But don't think for a minute, I've got it dialed in.

Simple Splurges

2012-01-30T22:13:00.000-08:00

Life is compiled of ups, downs, in-betweens, laugh lines, sore muscles, full tummies, sandy floormats, tired eyes, joyful moments, and
simple splurges.

And this weekend has been dotted with simple splurges!

Double ice cream scoop with four spoons ~ one spoon for Ty, one for Tanner, one for Bry, and, now that I think of it, I'm pretty sure Ty had one spoon in each hand :) Strawberry and Chocolate-Covered Banana never tasted so good! A family outing to TPT {one of my fave home decor places} the ice cream doubled as a distraction bribe, so I could take 30 minutes to search for the perfect find~ and find I did! An adorable pitcher to hold my orange ranuncula flowers in!

An impromptu beach outing down the street {and when I say down the street, I mean 5 MINUTES AWAY}, boardshort and bikini-clad (will I always be the odd woman out?), buckets and shovels in hand, beach parking, shuffling through the sand, claiming our towels and forming our rears only feet away from the waves. For the next hour I watched my husband run back and forth with the boys, filling buckets with salty water, only to pour it in the sandcastle moat, and repeat a zillion more times!
And then they came...one, then two, and suddenly our sloppy sandcastle was surrounded, not by seagulls, but by four little beach kids, joining in on our family fun. The fun arrow was apparently pointing down on the moment, and for the next half hour, nothing else mattered, just the six of us digging in the cold sand, making mountains out of beach magic.

Saturday night, my thoughtful hubby surprised me with a belated birthday celebration. My parents came over to get their grandson fix for the evening, and I was excited to get dressed up, spend more than 5 seconds on makeup, kick up my heels {literally} and get some us time! Opening the door, I was surprised to see my brother and sister-in-law, and dear friends Kim and Christian, standing in front of the car!
Surprise!
Dinner for two, turned into a celebratory feast for six at Salt Creek Grille. Dim lighting, a round table ideal for conversation, the best glass of Pinot Noir I've ever had, calamari, cheese plates, discussions about kids and starting small businesses, talk of getting older and the quality of where one chooses to live, french dip sandwiches, a big blue burger, garlic fries and comfortable laughter.

The weekend came to a close, on the heels of a new start. Monday rose with the sun, its arms open in welcome. What better than coming home from work to fire up the griddle and have an indoor, winter bar-b-que, complete with hot dogs and homemade potato salad {compliments to my mom-in-law}! An intentional menu alternative to chili and baked chicken. Who said hot dogs are only for summer picnics? Driving home, watching the fog roll in from the beach direction, the orange ball dipping its toes in the ocean, I was giddy for the off-season dinner! The perfect start to a fresh week.

A week of simple splurges!

Salty Tears

2012-01-22T19:52:00.000-08:00

We brought thirty-three Middle School Students from our church, along with some pretty awesome leaders, our boys, and headed up the San Bernardino Mountains to Winter Camp for the weekend. Tanner in the back, asking every 5 seconds, "Are these the mountains? Are we in the mountains yet?"

I love Middle School students, the majority itching to spend their parents hard-earned cash on a plethora of Icees, malts, and Sweet Tarts. Never mind it's 5 degrees outside! Jake, a 6th grader, even told me at lunch that his parents had given him $27.00 and he intended to spend every penny on just the right thing! He had also eaten all the weekend snacks his mom had packed, on the bus-ride up!

Gotta love middle school students ~ what you see is typically what you get. They say it like it is, love sugar, and pride themselves on staying up as late as they can. They are figuring out who they are, what this life of insecurity, simplistic sweetness, and growing confidence is all about.

I love camp for so many reasons.
Amazing speakers.
Cabin time with intentional conversations.
Milkshakes.
Late nights.
Kids running around, high on sugar and lack of sleep!

I love that we bring our boys on trips like these, doing life together as a family, while hanging out with twelve and thirteen year-olds.
I love that our boys get to be around people who love Jesus, clap with worship, and play with older kids.
I love "getting away from it all" and just being, without the everyday distractions.

But my absolute favorite part about camp is a little silly and entirely selfish.
Lend me your ear, lean in, so I can whisper...

I love getting some me time.

Me time, you ask? At camp?

Yes.

Those sacred hours, after I've tucked my angels into bed, and the rest of camp is at evening chapel.
When the air is quiet, and it's me and God, and maybe a good book.

No TV.
No movies.
No Target.
No other people to talk with.

Just two twin beds, a room, our boys sleeping on the other side of our shared wall, and
me.

It's fabulous!

Last night was no exception.
Snuggled in bed, I read and re-read one of my favorites, Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist. Shauna is a long-lost friend I've never met. We sit around her large kitchen table and drink obscene amounts of coffee, gabbing about momhood, writing, and all the dirty facets of life, faith, and grace. She is one of the key players in awakening my passion for words and writing.

And last night I was crying with her through her miscarriage, struggles in job and church, and our shared passion for entertaining.

I cried cleansing tears.

Tears made up of our recent move, the overwhelming details of living in a new city, and the joys of making our house a home.

Tears for wanting to get connected, needing couple friends, and for a deep gratitude for God's provision.

I cried for the indescribable love I have for my boys, my two healthy boys who make me laugh more than anything, and who daily display God's creativity and unseen presence.

I cried for the season Bryan and I are emerging from, with a growing confidence, eager to be whole again, and wide-eyed at the abundance of blessings that God continues to heap on our hearts.

The tears kept falling. Salty icicles, running down my cheeks and pooling on my mouth. And I let them pool. Allowing myself to savor their meanings, and soak in the significance of every tear.

As a young girl, one of my most vivid memories of my grandma, my mom's mom, was doing her makeup and hair. She'd sit on the family room floor, leaning back on her elbows, her eyes closed to the sun-soaked room. And while I painted her thin eyelids a bright blue, her cheeks a berry, and finished her lips with coral lipstick
{a waxy, airy fragrance I can recall even now} I remember her talking about my mom, her daughter.
And crying.
Every. Time.

She'd express her deep love for my mom, and what a wonderful daughter she was. Leaning over her face, gently circling the brush on her paper-thin cheekbones, I can still see her cry as she spoke. Beautiful, light tears, that cascaded from under her lower eyelids and down her lips. I recall being struck by the ease her tears had in coming, and her not being ashamed as they fell. Specifically, I remember her reverently licking away the tears on her lips, almost as if she was recycling their merit, for the next time I'd do her makeup, and she would once again, talk about my mother, and cry.

So when the tears came last night, I thought of my grandma, and I let them fall. One after another.
Freeing.
Cleansing.
Healing.
Celebrating.
Thanking.

Big ol' fat tears {say it in the Forrest Gump voice when he'd talk about shrimp.. 'big ol' fat shrimp!'}

Big 'ol fat tears!

The tears pooled on my lips, and I let them sit there. The same way my grandma had.
Reverently.
Unashamedly.
Allowing the saltiness to remind me of what each tear symbolized, before wiping them away with the back of my pajama sleeve.

Once my inner faucet turned off, and my tears ran out, I closed my book, feeling freer than I have in ages.
Cleansed.
Reflective
Thankful for some me time, even if it came in the form of tears.

Thankful for Winter Camp with Middle School Students.
And for milkshakes.
Thankful for Bittersweet.
And for this new chapter in our family.
Thankful for my grandma's tears.
And for my own.

Those big, ol' fat salty tears!

The BEST ~ Part 2

2012-01-10T23:19:00.000-08:00

Thanks for all the amazing feedback and excitement regarding my last post about Cindy Lane… it means the world!

So many blessings have come about with our new move, that I owe it to God’s BEST, to write Part 2.

Remember when I mentioned I’m a ‘Get ‘er done’ kinda gal?

Yes, my planning overdrive kicked in after we received the call about the Cindy Lane home. This time in the form of Pre-School…

Oh shoot, now we have to take Tanner out of his beloved Pre-School, with the five classmates/friends he consistently prays for and talks about. Where will he go?

Immediately I remembered this darling gal I had met at our church’s Blogging Team meeting.

We’d made small talk.

She’d mentioned she taught at an awesome Christian Pre-School in Costa Mesa.

She had all boys in her class.

I think I still had the school card she’d given me.

Yes, here it was!

The Director answered the phone, and I could’ve sworn we were long-lost friends.

Yes, she’d love to meet us!

Yes, she had an opening in her schedule to show us around later that day!

And yes, a little boy in Miss Megan’s class was leaving, and a spot had suddenly opened for the exact days and times we were looking for!

Of course!

God’s BEST!

Tanner and I jumped in the car, stopping at his current Pre-School to drop off the letter about his immediate departure {can a three year-old withdraw from Pre-School?}, and headed to my work.

My boss was out, so I phoned him from work, only to find he was sitting on an airplane, moments before taking off! I explained that we’d found a home, were moving that weekend {let’s not waste time}, and would it be okay to take a couple of days off to get settled? His excitement took me back! After asking where we were moving, he eagerly rattled off the nearest Target, Sprouts, grocery stores…

Time off from work to get settled in our new home. Check!

God’s BEST!

Off to check out the new Pre-School…

Meeting up with Bryan, we walked in, only to be embraced by the Director {I told you we were long-lost friends!}, and get the royal tour. We were escorted into a classroom full of students, and Tanner was able to play with the kiddos, do puzzles, overhear Bible stories being told, meet Miss Megan, note the cool plastic spiders in the toy bin, and was apparently sold before we had even been there five minutes!

They take field trips!

They had one opening in Miss Megan’s class!

The teachers are energetic, everyone is having fun, and the environment is amazing. It made me want to go back to Pre-School.

And the BEST?

Was that my Tanner, my observant, take-it-all-in fellow, who has the most compassionate heart, but didn’t necessarily inherit his mom’s instantaneous outgoing temperament, he could not stop talking about his new school.

His new friends.

The Bible stories.

The books.

And the spiders! {What? There were spiders? Ah yes, the plastic toys.}

Fabulous new Pre-School for Tanner.

Check.

God’s BEST!

And sprinkled in with the BEST, was my sister-in-law. She played with the boys for hours so that Bryan and I could take a load down to the house, without snack interruptions, baths, possible whining {what?}

And, she brought the best housewarming gift ever~ dessert!!! Chocolate, chocolate chip bundt cakes from Nothing Bundt Cakes! Two words: Danger Zone! J

Killer desserts. Check.

Yes, still God’s BEST.

And the blessings keep coming…

Praise the Lord! Sing to the Lord a new song, his praise in the assembly of the godly!

The BEST

2012-01-04T22:31:00.000-08:00

December 10, 2011... that's the day I first began this post. When the water had just begun to boil...
It's been steeping for almost one month.
...

We've been looking for a place to live that's closer to church, for quite some time.
And in the mean time, we are living with my folks.
And they are great.
But we are ready to be a family of four again.

So, we look E-V-E-R-Y D-A-Y!!!!

And about a month ago, we found, what seemed to be the "perfect home."
It was in a neighborhood.
East side Cost Mesa, to be exact.
With a HUGE backyard, hardwood floors, plenty of room to play, and entertain, and host parties, and feel like we are back in a house.
Mentally decorating the entire place, I had already fallen in love with it.

And it was almost a done deal, until the owner didn't return our phone calls, and didn't return our phone calls, and didn't return our phone calls...

And when we finally did talk with her, only to learn that she thought our children were a concern {our children, a concern!} Only then did we realize, it wasn't a good fit. The BEST fit.

... Hot water.

At the time, I knew that in my gut, but not in my address book. If I were truly honest, I'd admit, that having only one bathroom was not ideal,
the decrepit fireplace was a concern,
and the 70's pool table crouched in the middle of the living room did not make a stellar entertaining buffet.
But I wanted to look past that and be a family, in that home. The home on Flower St.

There's a peace that happens in one's soul when you realize there's something better, something worth waiting for. Whether it be a soul-mate, a job, or in this case, a home, we knew the BEST was out there, now if we could just find it!

... I can hear the kettle singing...

Our affair with Craigslist began again. A realtor friend offered up-to-the-minute rental listings. Scouring the Internet 200 times a day, looking for a house, any house that was in our price range, in a decent area... and nothing.

Thanksgiving came and went.
We started to get antsy.

Christmas came and went.
The stir-craziness was at an all-time high.

Yet, we still had a peace, the BEST was yet to come.

... The piping kettle bows to the mug and waiting tea bag...

Last Friday, Bryan and I had a date day. My folks graciously offered to watch the boys so we could patrol neighborhoods. Four hours later, we were tired, cranky, and discouraged. Looking out the window, I muttered something about wanting to drive by a cute home, where a sweet man would be hammering a For Rent sign in the grass. He'd smile, and welcome us in, and we'd share a latte, and the rest would be history.

Bryan interrupted my ramblings and mentioned dinner. Thankfully pasta and an overabundance of cheese solves all problems, and we came home determined.

As we laid in bed that night, Bryan, half-asleep, handed me his phone, where I could barely make out a cute home for rent in Huntington Beach.

Side note: For those of you who know me, and if you don't, know this: I don't waste time. If there's something to be done, I'm on it. It can be a bit obsessive :) There was actually a college class, Beginnings, that all freshmen were required to take, and it was centered around StrengthsFinder. It's basically a test that determines each individual's strengths and how to better use them. Woo was my #1, the description noting, Impatient for Action... so there you have it!

So there I am, attempting to email this guy about his house, and the keypad on Bry's phone is shrinking by the minute, and I'm so tired, that I'm sure my words came out in jumble, something about cute boys, and making it a home, and baking brownies...

And in a wink, it was Saturday morning, and we were there. Sitting in front of the Huntington Beach house. A slap-stick silly grin on our faces.

We walked up to the porch, noting the freshly planted white flowers, the screen door welcoming us in.
And
We
Were
Home.

It felt right. More than right.
The room, the yard, the tiny vertical cupboard in the kitchen that holds baking sheets.

And the owner, well, we felt right at home with him too. A long-lost friend, catching up, in an empty house.

He told us that just the night before, he was hammering the sign in the lawn, and ...

The perfect cup!

And here, we thought we'd live on Flower St. That was good.

We received the call last night. Out of 20 applicants, our family was at the top of his list.
Welcome home.

Cindy Lane.
Our new street.
One that's been prayed for, waited on, and believed in.

And come Saturday, Cindy Lane will be met by our family.
...

A month-long post, coming full circle!

Cheers to a perfect cup of God's BEST!

I'd rather...Sometimes!

2011-12-22T09:09:00.000-08:00

I'd rather

I'd rather see a musical, than a movie
Read a book, than scrapbook
Create a gift, rather than buy one

I'd rather drink tea lattes, than coffee
Ride a bike, than drive
Take a hip-hop class, rather than yoga

I'd rather

I'd rather soak up the salt air, than breathe mountain sky
Drink a margarita, than a martini
Take in the sights of Spain's cafe-lined streets, rather than New York's Time Square

But sometimes...

The dryer-sheet dreams become crunchy realities

Sometimes...

I yell at my kids, rather than pray for patience

Use biting words, rather than bite my tongue

Covet bigger and dazzlier, rather than claim contentment

I'd rather

I'd rather have laugh lines, than flawless skin
Be rich in family, than house-poor
Try new desserts, rather than eat the same sweets

I'd rather have hard conversations with dear friends, than never go deep at all
Love my guts out, than cacoon my heart in
Wear my heart on my sleeve, rather than keep others guessing how I truly feel

Sometimes ...

I am intimidated by other's success, rather than feel inspired

Focus more on the 10% of marriage ick, rather than the 90% of marriage fab

Analyze situations to death, rather than enjoy life as it comes

Sometimes ...

I wish I walked in other's shoes, rather than write my own story

Worry about tomorrow, rather than claim God's promises

Scold myself for not doing enough, rather than congratulate myself on doing just right

I'd rather

I'd rather take risks, than be complacent in the wrong fit
Pray for trials to trust God more, than have an "easy" life
Lean more to the side of asking questions, rather than making statements

And
Sometimes...
I remind myself that the millions of
I'd rather
dreams
stirred with
the
thousands of
sometimes
realities
create a beautiful picture of my
life

And it makes me extremely grateful for dryer-sheet dreams and crunchy realities!

Handmade tags

2011-12-20T08:22:00.000-08:00

Dear Handmade Tags,

I'm just gonna say it like it is...

You are fabulous!

You make even the most drab boxes, come alive.

You are individual

And {sometimes} colorful

And extremely easy-going!

You're stinkin' fab, is what you are!

Here you are, wonderful as Everyday Tags ~

Cute as can be, as Baby Tags ~

As cheery, Christmas tags ~

And a special shout-out to the handmade bookmarks.

You hold a special place in my heart, and my book pages :) ~

Keep up the good work, tags!

Priceless words, and names are written on you, ones that will be treasured for years to come!

Shopping for Giving Tree Gifts

2011-12-13T08:24:00.000-08:00

As a parent, I struggle during the Christmas season with the balance of celebrating Jesus' birthday, and encouraging my boys to bask in the wonder of presents and stockings.

That fine balance of gently reminding our children that the reason we have Christmas is because Jesus was born, and the reason we give and get gifts is really to throw our Savior a huge birthday party, and celebrate with our families.

And somewhere in-between reading the Christmas Story, gathering the family at Christmas Eve Service, leaving cookies for Santa, and carrots for his reindeers, somewhere between matching pj's, hot cocoa before bed, stuffed stockings, and the anticipation of Christmas morning, lies the magic of Jesus' birth.

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. ~ Isaiah 9:6

Some of my favorite childhood memories are held tight from Christmas morning. Following a breakfast of my mom's amazing egg casserole dish, cinnamon rolls, and juice, we gathered around the tree, the fireplace glowing, starting first with our stockings, and moving on to the gifts resting under the green pine-needles and colorful ornaments.

I was maybe 6 or 7 when I opened My Child, a doll that I'd dreamt about forever, with a soft, human-like face and perfect features. All morning, I stared at my new doll, playing with her hair, fingering her cheeks, taking in the wonder of her detailed dress. She was my very own, and she didn't leave my side all day. Or, for the years to come.

It was pure magic. Innocent wonder and awe, and a deep appreciation for such a treasured gift. And I want my boys to have that same enthrallment with unwrapping gifts. I can't wait to watch their eyes grow wide, and hear their delighted shriek at opening a gift that we know they will love, play with, and share with friends. Nothing in me wants to stifle that feeling, or be Scroog-ish about Christmas when it comes to gift-giving.

It's just that I want them to know why we give and get gifts. Why we spend hours thinking of the perfect surprise for their cousins, or grandparents, or teacher... because Jesus is the better than anything we can open with wrapping paper and ribbon!

Our church does something really cool, that helps our family blend the joy of gift giving, with the true JOY of celebrating Jesus' birth ~

A Giving Tree with a twist, one could say.

People can grab a Giving Tree Tag, and buy a gift card in the specified dollar amount.

Volunteers, then take the gift cards, and buy presents for a child with a specific age and gender.

Our family volunteered to buy gifts with the donated gift cards and

what
a
blessing
it
was!

We were given $60 in Target gift cards to choose four gifts for children~ 2 boys and 2 girls, 0-2 years old.

Before we left, we sat with our boys and eagerly shared.

{Cliff notes version}

What is Christmas Day about?
Jesus' birthday!!

And why do we get to buy presents for other people, and get presents in return?
To celebrate His birthday!

Yes!

Do you know that some families don't have enough money to buy gifts, or get gifts on Jesus birthday?
Silence.

We get to do something really cool!
We get to go to Target and buy presents for four little kids so that they'll have presents to open on Christmas Day!
Do you want to pick out something for them, that you think they would really, really like?
Yes?

Yes!
{cheers!}

Let's go!

Up and down the toy aisle we went, Tanner and Ty looking, pointing, and shrieking at toys they thought the kids would like.

They decided on loud, musical, hands-on toys for the boys.

And a baby doll, and grocery shopping cart for two little girls.
Here, Ty is taking in all the pink. If I'm really honest with myself, I'm sure he was trying to poke her in the eye too. Especially because she had the eyes that open and shut. Needless to say, he was beyond intrigued.

After holding the gift cards in his pocket during the shopping excursion, Tanner handed them over to purchase the children's presents.

On the way home, we soaked in the excitement the boys and girls would feel, when opening the Christmas gifts.

Happy Birthday to Jesus, and joy to those families.

And as Tanner said quietly, before we pulled into the driveway,

"Those kids are going to be really, really happy."

It may not be the Christmas paper, bows, tags or sparkly ribbon, it may not even be the gift itself, but for our family, going to Target and getting four gifts for two little boys, and two little girls, it was the closest we'll come to giving a gift to the King, Himself.

Happy Birthday Jesus, and Merry Christmas little ones!

2nd Annual Christmas Cookie Baking: Gingerbread Men

2011-12-08T14:55:00.000-08:00

Last year was the First Annual Christmas Cookie Baking Day with Tanner and Mana {Bry's mom}

They dipped Oreos in chocolate, and engulfed the chocolate with peppermint pieces.

I think the cookies were eaten that very day!

In honor of the 2nd Annual Cookie Baking Day {cuz I'm a tradition-at-heart-kinda-gal}, we celebrated at her home in Encinitas.

Cookie Baking Goal: Gingerbread Men

First things first, putting on the Cookie Taster apron

Tanner couldn't wait to help

Side by side, both wearing their slippers

Rolling out the dough on powdered sugar {I learned that gingerbread dough on powdered sugar makes the cookies taste sweeter, and keeps the molasses color, as opposed to using flour}

Laying each gingerbread man on a Silpat, Tanner took a straw and put a hole at the top of the head {to later put ribbon through}

Here, Tanner did great, but some innocent gingerbread men were poked multiple times in their noggins, ending their fates as cute gingerbread men.

Rolling out the dough on powdered sugar {best if chilled}

Helping press the cookie cutter in the dough

Gingerbread men laying next to one another, before being baked

I'm not quite sure what happened to the poor skinny guy in the middle!

Being a team

He's a great 'Cookie Taster!' :)

Loving every minute of it!

Gingerbread angel

Mana showing him how to use the spatula and put the gingerbread man on the cookie sheet

They are ready for the oven

Evidence of a fun baking afternoon

Out of the oven, cooled, and T is decorating "our family"

Easy frosting-decorating hint: place frosting in a small plastic ziplock, cut a small hole in the corner, and squeeze

"I did it!"

Having already devoured mine, the rest of our family remains ~ the one on the left is Bryan, and on the right, Ty

Please make note that the large frosting glob is Bryan's "tummy" HA!!!

And there you have it~ the cutest gingerbread man ever! Perfect to eat, or hang on the tree.

Or both!

2nd Annual Christmas Cookie Baking Day was quite a success, and yummy too!

Thanks Mom!

The gift of empathy

2011-12-06T20:46:00.000-08:00

September gives birth to Fall, with Halloween on it's heels, and Thanksgiving around the corner, barely before Christmas decorations are out... It's the holiday season!

And with this season, comes talk of peace on earth, joy, cheer, and all the warm, fuzzy feelings surrounded by our Savior's birthday!

And it's great!
But it's a season!

One that, if I'm honest, can feel a bit like a let-down when it's come, and gone.

After the flurry of cookie-baking, gift-wrapping, tag-making, holiday-decorating, family picture-sending, Christmas Eve service-attending, present-opening, Santa lap-sitting, family dinner-eating, Christmas light-admiring, and thank you-card writing, turning the calendar page to January is a little sad.

Because it means the holiday season has come
And gone.

And a year-long idea has slowly seeded in my heart.

The gift of empathy.

Surprisingly, it began at work a couple of weeks ago.
I'd barely walked in the door and the phone was already ringing off the hook {working at an event rental company, you can imagine the busy holiday season} so I answered.

The gruff voice on the other end was a man demanding to make an order. NOW!

He was obviously in a hurry, and I quickly entered his information. As we spoke, I made small talk, and could hear the tiredness in his voice, so much so, that it was as if I was sitting across from him, watching him cradle the phone, eyes vacant, staring off into nothingness. I continued to take his order, only to learn that the tables and linens were needed for a funeral service for his sister, who had suddenly died unexpectedly the day before Thanksgiving! My heart in my throat, I continued. Verbally, I asked for his credit card information, but in my mind, I was reaching out to take his hand and tell him how sorry I was for his loss. How horrible that must be. And that it was okay for him to be grumpy.

Empathy.

Before I hung up, I quietly whispered, "I am so sorry for your loss."

It was quiet. And then a gentle reply, "Thank you. It's really hard right now."

Hanging up, I felt the hot tears, pulling at my bottom eyelids. I shuffled papers, muffled a sniffle, and tried to keep busy.

Empathy.

Here's the thing about empathy~ the more I practice it, the more it grows. The more I allow it to sprout branches and leaves, offering shade and a listening ear, the more it firmly roots.

And I'm okay with it.

Because it takes my thoughts off of me.

Empathy reminds me to 'sit in it' with someone, to try to see what else is going on beneath the surface. Because there is always something going on, good or bad!

It doesn't take much, it's not a quick-fix, a pep-talk, or a hurried 'God Bless You' on your way to the next place. It's an intentional moment to hear, really hear, through the words and body language, and into someone's heart.

Empathy.

Empathy doesn't mean I turn into an emotional wreck when everyone's dog dies, or blubber when my boys get hurt. It's a very human reminder that everyone has a story. And while some of those stories are fabulous, some ain't so pretty!

And it happened again today.

Empathy.

A middle-aged lady came in with her {clearly ill} sister, and the sister's caregiver. At first glance, I thought the sick sister had been tragically burned on her face. She talked out of one side of her mouth, and her too-large eyes, darted around the room. Her tiny frame weighed maybe 80 pounds, sopping wet! She occasionally chimed in while placing the order.

"And we need cocktail glasses."
"Don't forget the linens."

The older sister was devotedly patient, explaining that they we were getting to that.

My job as Hospice Volunteer Director came avalanching back.
Look in her eyes.
Speak to her.
Show her she's valuable, even though it may be uncomfortable.

We walked around the room and I showed the sisters various linen colors, table sizes, and cocktail glasses.

Too tired, the sick sister took a seat with her caregiver, while the other sister finished up the order.

"Thank you," she said, leaning over the counter and almost reaching into my chair.
This is the first time my sister has been out in a while. Clearly, you can see she is very ill. It's amazing she's even here. We almost lost her last Christmas."

I asked what she had, and she went on to explain that she has a rare immune disease that often puts her in the hospital, only to catch every illness and disease there, which almost leads to her death.

"She's a miracle," I smiled.

We exchanged a look. A look from a sister that loves her sick sister more than life itself.
"She's my only sibling. My only sister."

Empathy

Those darn tears again.

I looked up to see tears in her eyes too and it was a beautiful, silent exchange of a thousand words. A thousand 'thank you's from her, for treating her sister like a person, and not just someone ill. My eyes told her a thousand 'you're amazing's' for the endless love and caregiving she sacrificially gives.

In that moment, the empathy tree sprouted a bud. A tiny, white, bud.

Yes, the season shouts peace, joy, and warm fuzzy feelings. And I celebrate that!

But every day, holidays or not, I intend to wrap up the gift of empathy and give it away.
Preferably, with an adorable, home-made tag :)

It's an Orange Circle kinda Friday!

2011-12-02T16:38:00.000-08:00

Family Fun Fridays.

We live for them.

It's Bryan's day off, and our day as a family to have adventures.

Some Fridays, we lounge in our pj's and hang out at home. Others, we leave after breakfast, for a day of fun!

I love Fridays.

And today, we went to the Orange Circle, one of our favorite spots ever!

The Orange Fountain featured a giant Santa. Bryan showed Tanner an up-close view of the Jolly Man!

Ty was attempting to pull the huge ornaments off the tree~ not sure what he wanted to do with them, but he was quite determined {my strong-willed lil' munch!}

Lunch destination: The Filling Station {thank you Groupon for offering $30 worth of food, for $15!}

I've learned to never go without a handful of crayons. Entertainment for at least 30 minutes~ perfect distraction while we wait for food, or ride in the car. I keep them in a small bag in my purse.

And Ty enjoys playing with a toy jet. If only you could hear all the boy noises he makes. People were literally laughing at him, while he crashed the jet again and again on the table :)

It was a brisk, chilly day. Perfect for sweaters and hoodies! We walked around the Circle after lunch, browsing the storefronts, cupping a warm cup of Chai, and window shopping. Of course we stopped at Country Roads, my favorite Antique Mall in North Orange County.

How cute is this? Hanging hand mirrors! Adorable idea in a bathroom.

I have an old frame that I've been trying to figure out what to do with. When I saw this, I thought, "Yes!" Burlap background is the perfect solution. If you look closely, you can see sparkles on the burlap. I may need to do some investigating and figure out how to do that! So fun!

We drove home, Christmas music singing on the radio, our hearts content, and our tummies full.

What a wonderful Family Friday!

Pogue Pictures

2011-11-30T20:46:00.000-08:00

I love taking family pictures!

Probably because we don't have them taken very often!

And they hint at a new season {usually mid-November}

And it's an excuse to get new clothes for my boys, and, ahem, myself!

And, it means new pictures for all the frames my picture wall can hold!

In honor of Ty's First year, the holiday season, and the fact that it's been a YEAR since we last took family pictures, it was beyond time!

A long-time friend, Lindsay {like a sister}, recently started doing photography. The girl oozes creativity, has an amazing eye, and an even sweeter spirit. I love helping people get a jumpstart on their passions, and she agreed to take our family photos :)

There are no words. She did a fabulous job of capturing the four of us.

If any of you want a fabulous photographer who is reliable, reasonable, and just plain wonderful, check out Lindsay Reskey Photography ~ www. lindsayreskey.com

Tanner with his first ever, saved-for toy!

He and his Bumblebee Transformer Robot are inseparable

I'm biased, but I just love this guy!

How fun is the brick wall background?

Sharing a sweet moment with my little men

What you usually don't see in people's christmas cards, or in frames, are the meltdown moments that occur in every photo session...

and the tired eyes...

But kissing pictures are a must!!

Do you know it's nearly impossible to get both kids looking at the camera at the same time? :) What do large families do?

Our boys look like they are being tortured!

No mom and dad, no more pictures, guys!

So we do what any good parent does~ we throw 'em upside down!

Always guarantees some giggles!

For us too!

This is one of my faves!

Have you noticed that Ty's mouth is always open? :)

Brotherly love!

Ty at his finest!

Sweet T

Hope you enjoyed them as much as we do!

Thanks again, Linds!!

Thanksgiving in a Backpack

2011-11-29T08:15:00.000-08:00

Praying over the backpack, before dropping it off at church!

We’ve had our turkey, stuffing, and second helpings of pumpkin pie, but the memory of participating in Thanksgiving in a Backpack still leaves our family’s hearts full.

As a church, we teamed up with Giving Children Hope’s “We’ve Got Your Back” Program. The goal of Thanksgiving in a Backpack was simple~ over 1,000 backpacks were available to fill with Thanksgiving food items, and teachers from participating schools gave the filled backpacks to students in need, to ensure a Thanksgiving experience. Simple, but the impact was huge!

Imagine, a student attending school, just like any other day, only to be gifted a backpack by their teacher. A backpack bursting with instant mashed potatoes, canned meat, fruit, juice, and all the other Thanksgiving goodies. Huge? Yes, for that student and his or her family. Thanksgiving dinner was served!

But for our family, especially our three year- old and one year- old boys, it was a teaching moment. One to reflect on the abundant blessings we have, and more importantly, to emphasize the gift of blessing others.

We made a family adventure out of it, explaining to our boys that we were headed to the grocery store to choose yummy, healthy foods for a family that doesn’t have an opportunity to have Thanksgiving dinner. Tanner, our oldest, quickly caught on that he could pick out his favorite foods for the family. In the cart went his preferred cereal, juice, and macaroni and cheese. With each item, he grinned, saying it was going to a family, with a boy his age! Our list complete, we headed home to fill the backpack.

Sitting on the kitchen floor, surrounded by the Thanksgiving food, we prayed over each food item. Tanner in his sweet, three year-old voice, “God, please make the family happy with this soup.” “God, thank you for these veggies {what kid prays for veggies?}”

Another food.

Another prayer.

Another reminder that we have so much to be thankful for.

What a fabulous opportunity to show our boys a tangible demonstration of blessing another family. Our eyes were damp with tears as the four of us huddled on the floor, hands on the stuffed backpack, praying for the family that would receive the Thanksgiving meal. That night, the Thanksgiving in a Backpack tradition was born.

So, to the family that enjoyed the Cheerios, peach fruit cups, and surprise hot chocolate packets, be blessed.

I know we were! Because that’s what giving is all about, each of us helping out one another, the best we can. Nothing better than having our hearts full with thanksgiving!

Thankful List

2011-11-21T22:52:00.000-08:00

It's almost Thanksgiving!

Aside from the anticipation of spending Thursday with family, holding our newest, sweet nephew, Wyatt, eating too many rich foods, and intentionally just being,

we pause to reflect,

remember,

and be thankful.

Everyone in our family is extremely grateful, not only this week, but in this season.

Tanner is thankful for...

Any opportunity to laugh {hence, the sticky foam shapes he decorated himself with}

Superheros!

His Pre-School friends. He prays for them every night.

By name.

Travis.

Ellie.

Noah.

Naomi.

Lizzie.

Ty is thankful for ~

His new~found obsession with apples!

An older brother that sneaks him bites of ice cream!

New friends. There's that darn apple, again! At least he's sharing!

Bryan is thankful for~

The ability to love!

The opportunity to serve!

The responsibility to lead.

The heart to make it fun!

I am thankful for~

A life full of daily adventures!

New fingers and toes, and coos and smiles that joined our family in the form of our nephew, Wyatt!

Gooey desserts!

Watching my boys sleep. And dream. And become who God created them to be.

{Picture of Ty sleeping is not available, due to the wrath that would have ensued, had I attempted flash photography :)}

What is on your Thankful list?

SPARKLE!!!

2011-11-20T14:27:00.000-08:00

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium

Have you seen this movie?
Heard of it?
I hadn't, until today.
Today. This wonderfully, winter-ish, gray, drizzly, movie-watching, afternoon, kind-of day!

Tanner found it, hiding in the back, and Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium entertained us for the next couple of hours, while I snuggled with Tanner, and Ty motored around, moving blocks from one side of the room, to the other.

I encourage you to rent it, or better yet, just buy it!
Magical, creative, and sprinkled with amazing life nuggets, {not to mention Jason Bateman, one of my faves, plays a key role in this movie.}

It was while attempting to keep Bruiser from chewing on the line of blocks Ty was assembling, when I heard this line. Grabbing the remote, I rewound {is that still what it's called?} and was struck by this conversation:

"Do you see sparkle?"

"Sparkle?"

"Like something reflective of something bigger trying to get out!"

I LOVE THIS!
Like something REFLECTIVE of something BIGGER trying to get out!

Right there, with the fire going, the rain dripping, the blocks being arranged, something in my guts flip-flopped. And it hit me~

I'm the sparkliest I've been in a while.

My heart beats faster as I write, echoing in agreement with my fingers.

I'm walking in the steps God paved before me, from the beginning, when He created all things, saw every individual, and specifically gifted each one of us in an unfathomably, special way.

And my footprints match perfectly!

I'm doing what I was created to be.
Millions of creative bugs erupting inside, bursting to get out.

And it scares the heck out of me!

I fight it every day. Comparing myself to other who are better at it, have been doing it longer, and I take a millimeter shift back.

A dear friend's encouragement chimes in my ear, "Do not be intimidated by other's success, but be inspired by it."

YES!

I continue.
A millimeter scoot forward.
Hour by hour.
Day by day.
I'm following who God made me to be.

It's a new season of hope.

Behind me is the season of questioning, attempting to fit a square peg in a round hole, re-reading the same pages. Biting my lips and praying on my pillow, "Is this it?"

We've all been there. In a season of ~
A job we just do,
Marriage challenges
Child-rearing frustrations
A dry patch in our relationship with God
The mute button on our creativity remote.

But it's inside all of us. The small flutters we get when we are who we were made to be!

It may take some of us longer to find this gifting,
This groove.
But when you know, you know.

If it's teaching, teach.
Writing, write.
Designing, design.
Parenting, parent.

But dangit, do it!
Give it everything you have.
Millimeter by millimeter.
Not that we are ever there. But we sure as heck, are farther than if we had never tried in the first place.

Recently, I re-pinned {thank you Pinterest} a sign saying,
'Whatever you do in your spare time, do that for the rest of your life.'

I understand that that may not be an option for all of us, but it's what's behind the passion of what you do in your spare time.

It's probably seamless.
With passion.
A perfect fit.

A REFLECTION OF SOMETHING BIGGER TRYING TO GET OUT!!

A reflection of who God made you to be!

I'm wearing sparkle these days.
And I have no plans of taking it off.

Black Bottom Cupcakes and Snickerdoodles!

2011-11-16T21:06:00.000-08:00

As promised in a previous post {my, that was a lot of p's... Dr. Seuss would be proud!} here are the recipes for the fabulous desserts featured at Ty's party.

Side note about desserts...
They are a must!
Day or night!
Every.
Single.
Day.

I didn't realize what a dessert family I grew up in, until Bry and I got married. After a family get-together one evening he commented on the fact that we always have dessert.

My quizzical look, and cocked head silently asked him, 'Yes. And....?'

But it's not only that our family always has desserts, it's that there is always chocolate associated with the dessert.

My dad is the worst. The man lives for chocolate. Chocolate with peanut butter. Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Chocolate chip cookies.

And now that I think about it, my brother has it bad for the dark dessert as well. I vividly remember walking in on him in the kitchen when he was a Freshmen, his head shoved into the pantry, mumbling, and calling out to the chocolate chips, only to emerge, holding the Costco-size bag of Tollhouse Chocolate Chips, many of them evidently having jumped in his mouth.

But my mom may be the worst. The lady loves a mean slice of chocolate fudge cake. Linda's Fudge Cake from Cheesecake Factory or the darn Motherlode from Claim Jumpers often frequented our fridge as short-lived leftovers.

So, yes, it's true. We are not only a dessert family, but a chocolate dessert family! I can live with that!

And now for the recipes. I'll start with the killer chocolate cupcake. My mom makes them, and they may be the next best thing to..., well, they are darn good :)

Black Bottom Cupcakes

Batter:

1 1/2 c. flour

1 c. sugar

1/3 c. oil

1/2 t. salt

1 c. water

1/4 c. cocoa

1 t. vanilla

1 T. vinegar

1 t. baking soda

Mix and fill 20 cupcake molds about 1/2 full. Set aside. Make Cream Cheese Topping.

Cream Cheese Topping:

1 8 oz. package cream cheese {softened}

1/3 c. sugar

1 egg

Pinch of salt

Blend together, then add 1 6 oz. package of chocolate chips

Top each 1/2 filled cupcake mold with a heaping teaspoon of cream cheese topping. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes.

Aunt Cathi's Snickerdoodles

1 c. butter, softened
1 c. shortening
3 c. sugar
4 eggs
5 1/2 c. flour
4 t. cream of tartar
2 t. baking soda
1/2 t. salt
4 T. sugar
4 t. cinnamon

Mix thoroughly butter, shortening, sugar, and eggs. Blend in flour, cream of tartar, baking soda, and salt. Shape dough by rounded teaspoonfuls into balls.

* Mix sugar and cinnamon; roll balls in mixture.

Place 2 inches apart on ungreased baking sheet. {I use Silpat or parchment paper.} Bake 8-10 minutes, or until set, at 400 degrees. Remove immediately from baking sheet.
{Don't overbake! I usually take them out of the oven when puffy and starting to split... leave on pan to set and cool a bit.} As they cool, they harden.

Enjoy!
Bake a bit today.
Share with friends.
Play Thankful Elf and deliver to loved ones, with a tag letting them know you are Thankful for them!
But do save some for yourself :)

Ty & Tapas!

2011-11-01T20:57:00.000-07:00

Our littlest man, Ty Christian, turned the big O-N-E on October 13th!

So, we threw him a party!

Okay, we threw the adults a party, and the kids had fun too!

The idea of doing an afternoon fiesta with Tapas came to me months before, so I ran with it... I thought it was a unique take on a One-Year-Old Birthday Party, until BOTH our grandmas called asking who 'Tapas' was! Ha!

So, as I kindly explained, Tapas are:

Party comers were welcomed at the front door with the Tie and Tapas theme

And into the backyard~

I created a lamp/ tie mobile displaying pictures of Ty, from birth to 12 months. The idea came to me when I found a lamp skeleton at The Brick Basement in Fullerton. I knotted ties from the top, pinned pictures of Ty on each tie, and hung it by twine. Voi~ la!

Tapas are typically served with beer, wine, and homemade Sangria~

tie wine markers were available for the wine drinkers!

Paella is a truly authentic Spanish dish, and my mom-in-law {aka Martha Stewart} made this uh-mazing paella dish~

To display the food table, Bryan sanded down the top of our old kitchen table, and painted it with chalkboard paint. I simply wrote each food item directly on the table~

The menu consisted of cheese, crackers, fresh fruits, bread for olive oil and balsamic dips, stuffed olives, meatballs, dried fruits and nuts, orzo pasta salad, baked brie, and dried apricots/dates wrapped in prosciutto!

The kid food table offered p.b.&j. triangles, fruit kabobs, goldfish and string cheese

A wooden wine crate held Crushers and juice ~

The kiddos played 'Pin the Tie on Ty'~

We ordered a Costco poster of Ty, made white, cardstock ties, and each kiddo wrote their name on the tie, and decorated with stickers, foam shapes, and crayons.

Kids swung ...

And rode!

Family and life~long friends came to celebrate sweet Ty!

And then came time for dessert....

The sign in the background says, 'Eat Dessert First'

Here it comes... molten lava cake!

He was more excited about the whipped cream on top~ this can not be my son. He HAS to like chocolate :)

I love his faces~ his famous "bulldog" face with his scrunched nose!

At least he tried a little... :)

My mom made her UH-MAZING Black Bottom Cupcakes

And my Aunt Cathi baked her fabulous Snickerdoodles!!

{both recipes for a later post}

All in all, Ty's Tapas Birthday Party was a blast! Even Bruiser had fun!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SILLY TY!

Cheers/ Salud!

HAPPY DANCE!!!

2011-10-27T16:00:00.000-07:00

It forms in my head first.

And then I visualize myself doing it.

Pointer finger in the air, my other three fingers connecting with my thumb. In sign language it's a D, but in my reality, it's the beginning of...

THE HAPPY DANCE!

And then the other pointer finger goes in the air.
The music starts slowly. Then faster, and faster, and faster. {May I remind you that the music is in my head.} My fingers are pumping up and down, simultaneously with my knees, as I jump from one foot to the other, a big ol' grin on my face.

I look like a crazy person!

My husband knows this dance, and a few poor friends, who have happened to be with me on the fabulous occasion when THE HAPPY DANCE must be done.

And what is a celebratory occasion for this finger-pointing, bent knee-jumping silliness?

When I come across a fabulous find of this or that.

Take today for example: there I am, minding my own business, plopping Ty in his car seat to pick up Tanner from pre-school, dreaming of a Chik-Fil-A lunch date with my boys, backing out of the driveway, passing the neighbors house...

What's that on the curb?

An old locker? {I'm loving the color}

hmmm.. wait, could it be?

A vintage suitcase?

She can't be getting rid of it!

Is she? She must! It's on the curb!

THE HAPPY DANCE music begins ...

Suddenly, as if by a magnetic pull, my car is screeching into the neighbors driveway, and I'm hopping out, motioning to the suitcases, palms skyward in wonder, a goofy grin on my face, looking at her questioningly.

"Those suitcases?," she points. "Those were my grandfather's World War 2 suitcases. I'm getting rid of 'em."

I can hardly breathe. THE HAPPY DANCE music is deafening at this point, and I'm having trouble controlling my fingers from pointing upward.

"You know you can sell those for quite a lot," I explain. {Did I really just tell her that?} I silently scold myself. But hey, she is our neighbor and she could get quite a lot for them.

"Nope," she sweeps her hand at her packed garage and informs me that she is "cleaning out."

THE HAPPY DANCE is at full momentum now. My knees are bent springs, as I bounce from one foot to the other, fingers pointing at the sky, up and down, up and down, like french toast sticks popping up from the toaster!

HAPPY DANCE!! HAPPY DANCE!!

Authentic, original World War 2 suitcases. Well, blow me over with a feather, because this is a HAPPY DANCE occasion!!

Welcome, suitcases, you are the newest addition to my fabulous, Happy Dance Finds:

It's been a good season for THE HAPPY DANCE.

A couple of weeks ago, we took an impromptu family getaway to San Luis Obispo, and I frequented the Speckled Hens Show, where THE HAPPY DANCE debuted, once again!

My current accessory obsessions are funky long necklaces, large rings and must-have purses!

This is my latest fave necklace I found at the show~ On one side, a fun, yellow, textured pattern:

And on the other, my life motto, "Eat dessert first." How appropriate!

A chunky ring I scored at Little Italy's Farmer's Market in San Diego!

A must-have purse for this Fall! I'm the gal that buys a new purse once every two years, so this is big for me :)

What makes you do THE HAPPY DANCE? I can hear the music now...

An afternoon in Oahu!

2011-10-17T21:46:00.000-07:00

Tanner, Ty and I went to Hawaii today.

It wasn't as tropical as I wished, and I certainly wasn't wearing a bikini.

But the shave ice was fantastic!

Not bad for Oahu's Shave Ice and Ice Cream!

Shave ice in Yorba Linda? Who would've known!

Thank you 'Land of Gracious Living' for offering a sweet destination spot for gourmet, refreshing- flavored snow cones. With a scoop of ice cream, please!

Holding Ty in one arm, a diaper bag, purse, and bag of graham crackers on the other, and ushering Tanner toward an empty table, apparently I had a 'Please help Me' sign on my forehead.

'Miss Sweet as Pie' came running, pausing from a shave ice date she was sharing with her son.

"Oh, honey, let me get that highchair for you."

Kick. Kick. Pull. Pull. 5 minutes later, she managed to pry a sticky highchair from the grips of a stacked highchair party in the corner.

The small talk began.

Kids.
Yes, they are wonderful.
She commented on feeling like it was just yesterday that her kids were the ages of my boys now; 3 and 1.

And now? Hers are 20, 19 and Mr. 11 was sitting at the table, devouring her remainder of the shave ice.

We bonded over how crazy life is with little ones.

Why don't people really warn us about how insanely crazy life is with young ones?

Laughter.

My heart warmed. Nothing better than sharing authentic, raw parts of being a parent with a complete stranger.

More small chat.

I handed Tanner a spoon, and a graham cracker to Ty.

And then she threw it out there. This beautiful, heart-tipping invitation.

There's a group of moms with young kids that get together on Fridays at our church. You are more than welcome to come...

I couldn't help but smile.

She really was as sweet as pie. The opposite of a car salesman. No hidden agenda. No mental checklist-tallying.

She genuinely wanted to offer a place for me, as a mom, to hang out with other moms, and breathe a little easier, knowing I wasn't alone!

My wide smile thanked her and I explained that Wednesday mornings, I do just that~ get together with other moms at our new church.
To eat, connect, pray for one another, and get our cup filled.
A couple of intentional hours, knowing I'm not alone in this extreme, multi-tasking season, with its' unexplainable joys, moments of surprising anger, lengthy pondering sessions where I grapple the weighty parenting responsibility I play in the lives of our two precious sons!

We bonded over having husbands in ministry, mutual friends, Hume Lake connections, and the art of organization.
Kids.
Being moms.
It was a silent understanding we shared~ she's been there, and I'm in it now.

And it's beautiful on both sides of the spectrum.

'Miss Sweet as Pie', thank you for pausing your shave ice date with your son, to help me get a highchair.

Thank you for cooing over my boys, and taking a trip down memory lane with your own.

Thank you for inviting me to your church on Fridays mornings to hang out with other moms of young kiddos.

Thank you for being Jesus' hands, feet and mouth.

Please continue offering help to moms whose arms are full.
Please continue making small talk with perfect strangers.
Please continue inviting moms to a place they can recharge their battery. Or inviting someone to church. Or...

Because one of these days, you are going to change someones life.

A simple gesture.
A two minute conversation.
A genuine offer.

You were Jesus' hands, feet and mouth today.
And it was beautiful to witness.

As I left Oahu's Shave Ice and Ice Cream, my body was chilled from the killer Root Beer Float Shave Ice, but my heart was warmed by a stranger's love.

I want to be Jesus' hands, feet and mouth.

Whether or not I'm in Hawaii :)

My love obsession with Trader's

2011-10-12T08:03:00.000-07:00

Trader Joe's.

I'm a huge fan. HUGE!

Not because the store is the perfect size to know one's way around. So perfect, that even my 3 year old knows the direction to focus his cart to find the Apple Carrot Crushers.

Or the fact that everything they make is de-lish.

Or because Tanner can't wait to get there and steer the kid's cart up and down the aisle {I apologize to those who have almost been run over, or had their toes munched!}A lollipop and stickers end his experience.

No, it's not the samples. Or all ten employees I know personally due to my frequent trips to the back for a delectable bite. And back for seconds :)

I love Trader's because they constantly have amazing foods to try. I've thought about spending a day by the register, eyeing everyones' carts and then inquiring about their favorite dishes.

"Ooh, what's that?"
"What kind of rice do eat that fish with?"
"Is that dessert life-changing?"

I'm sure people wouldn't think that's weird at all!

Here are some of our family faves. Food items that regular our Trader's cart {and Tanner's too}. And, others that are new to our taste buds:

As mentioned before, a daily staple in my boys stomachs are the Apple Carrot Crushers. Fruit and Veggies on the move. Enough said.

Continuing on the kid consumption topic, my boys also eat one of these yogurts daily:

They have them in strawberry and banana too. At their ages, I don't want them to eat non-fat yogurt, so it's the ideal protein snack. Yum!

Fruit Pear Sauce. Yep, pear sauce. De-lish!

I love their packaged yellow squash too. 3 or 4 is perfect at a time. I cut them in long, diagonal strips, serve with ranch, and wa-la... sword sticks!

Now for the adult pallet, not that you can't live on yogurt or crushers...

These Marinated Chicken Chipotle Skewers are always replaced by another in our freezer. Brush with a little olive oil, pop in the oven, and 20 minutes later, they go great on rice, with salad, endless possibilities.. a must have!

Gorgonzola Gnocchi ~ I add frozen peas {a sweet kick} and grilled italian chicken sausage {for the meat-lover in us} and it's one of our favorite meals. Salad and a glass of wine. Done!

Planning for caprese salad later this week, I grabbed a small tub of their marinated, fresh mozzarella balls ~ skew a long stick with a couple of these, intermittent with cherry tomatoes, and basil leaves, and caprese salad on a stick is served!

And, last but not least, some of our favorite dessert treats:

Truffle Brownie Mix ~ out of the oven, with a heaping scoop of their French Vanilla Ice Cream... heaven!

Chocolate Croissants~ breakfast, lunch, or dinner, they are always amazing. So good in fact, that a dear friend, that lived in France for a couple of years, said they were comprable to those at the French Bakery, she used to purchase!

And, please take a moment of silence for this fabulous hunk of love {no, it's not my hubby}...
the Pound of Milk Chocolate goodness!

s!

Happy Trader Joe's- ing! Don't be surprised if you see me at the check-out counter, eyeing your cart. Please share your favorite item with me, and I'll kindly go away :)

Goodbyes

2011-10-04T21:23:00.000-07:00

Man's feelings are always purest and most glowing in the hour of meeting and of farewell. ~Jean Paul Richter

Goodbye.

We know it firsthand, as last week, we said goodbye to Bryan's job as Pastor of Student Ministries at RCC.

Goodbye to our church, the students, the friends, and our life group.

Although we are moving in God's leading, to pursue our love for middle school students, the future is frightening, hopeful, and possible, all in the same wonder. And bittersweet.

Thursday night was our final Life Group gathering at the Burke's home. Socializing for too long, exchanging hugs, and the week's update, we finally made our way up the steep stairs to the Great Room.

This room, with it's adorable Pottery Barn decor, wedding pictures, a creamy, marshmallow couch that is so comfortable when you sit in it your entire body relaxes as if you just returned from an hour-long massage, was where couples gathered, some on the yummy couch, others on chairs, Bryan and I usually in the corner with him sitting on the soft cubed ottoman, and I, nestled on the floor, my back against his legs, and my head leaning on his knee.

This was home.

It was where we laughed with other couples, opened the Word together, wrestled with scripture, prayed about life, encouraged one another, gave lots of sass {mostly from me to A.J. and Geoff, and well, everyone else}, always finished the night with dessert, and planned our next girl outing, or guy's poker night.

And on this night, in that Great Room, we said our final goodbye.

But what we received in return, was an unexpected blessing.

Bryan and I sat in our corner as friends spoke encouragement, validation, shared fun memories, and thanked us for the role we had played in their lives.

It was pure, beautiful and healing, all wrapped up in tears and Kleenex, and occasional laughter. Couples gathered around Bryan and I, laid hands on us, and prayed for the future of our next ministry, the students and families we get to love on, the home we will live in, the people we will do life with...

and then they gifted us what I joyfully call The Love Jar~ a Ball Jar {they know me well} with notes from every couple, verses, encouraging quotes, and a Cheesecake Factory gift card!

The first paper I read, instantly brought tears...

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." ~ Philippians 4:6-7

Unrolling the next paper, an encouraging quote~
You are valuable because you exist. Not because of what you do or what you have done, but simply because you are. ~ Max Lucado

Paper after paper, the encouragement and prayers and personal words stared back at me. To be forever savored, put on mirrors, read over and over.

As we drove home that night in silence, soaking up the beautiful scene that we had been gifted, we couldn't help but think this:

Everyday we should live goodbye.

Tell people why we appreciate them.
Pray for them, yes, right there, in the middle of Target.
Hug them and tell them they are valuable.
Verbalize that they are loved!
Remind them of the power their legacy is leaving.

Because we all need to know we are loved and special. And that we will be missed, might we leave.

So thank you, Fullerton Life Group, our dear friends, thank you for your love.
For the Jar of Love.
For sending us off feeling valued, special, and confident of God's future with our family.

Goodbye.

Life lessons, Insight, and God Growth

2011-09-22T15:08:00.000-07:00

I'm learning a lot right now.
About myself.
About life.
About the kind of person God is creating and redefining in me.

Allow me to unzip my heartstrings and pull out the raw, real guts of life and share some of it with you...

I want to be more patient. With my family. With my boys. With my husband. So, when I start to get anxious, and I feel my heart-rate climbing, I've turned into a crazy woman that prays out loud! Yep, I literally say, "Lord, please give me patience, 'cuz I just may lose it!" If you see a short, curly-haired gal walkin' around Orange County with two adorably, energetic boys, looking toward heaven, and waving her hands frantically, it's just me praying out loud.

The older I get, the more "me" time I need. To recharge, regroup, and refocus. It's better for all of us, trust me!

I miss working. I'm looking for a part-time job, to help our family financially, and use my gifts and skills. Not sure what that is, but if I hear of a dream opportunity that involves writing, decorating, creativity, I'm there :)

I'm intentionally surrounding myself with life-giving friends that point me back to Christ, "sit in life" with me, encourage, call me out on where I need to grow, and desire to soak up every minute of life.

I'm a Nordy's girl with a TJ Maxx budget!

I have to keep my mind going with at least one or two reads at all times! Currently, Sarah's Key and Imaginary Jesus. Go. Buy. Both. Now. :)

I'm stronger than I think I am. In the last 7 1/2 years of marriage, we've moved four times {not including the three times we've stayed with my folks during transition}, worked at three churches {currently preparing to move to a fourth church}, been through extreme joys and dark seasons. God has nothing but the most amazing plan for our family and although I'm scared for this next adventure, I want nothing more than to participate in the story He has written.

I have no will-power when it comes to chocolate. An adorable apothecary jar with the word Essentials scrawled across it, sits in the family room. My mom insists on keeping it filled with miniature candy bars. My rear and midsection thank you for that, Mom. Must. Say. No! Or at least cut back to only three or four a day! Geesh!

I feel guilty that I don't always enjoy being a mom.

I get caught up in comparison, and am learning to appreciate and thank God for making me the only Bekah Jane on this planet. Amazing that self-discovery is a life-long journey!

I have to be outdoors, walking, playing at the beach... I wouldn't be a good Washington resident.

My heart is stirred by creativity, decor, and little things that make people feel touched.

I'm 30 and oftentimes think, "I'm married and have two kids. How did this happen? And why don't I feel more put together?" :)

I can feel it. I'm at a launching point where everything that has led up to this point, is going "to be made beautiful in His time." My time has come.

I'm here, Lord. Use me. Teach me. Have your way with me. I'm a bit fragile right now, but that may be the ideal spot to be.

Cheers to life lessons, insight and God growth!

For the love of a captured moment!

2011-09-19T15:47:00.000-07:00

For those who you have been to my home, or have YET to be, you know full well that I'm obsessed with photos.

Family photos.

Baby photos.

Wedding photos.

Old photos.

You get the gist... anything that is a reminder of a moment, a look, a perfect day, is only meant to be taken, framed, and enjoyed for all the world to see.

I started a new afternoon tradition with the boys. After naps, we venture outside, spread a huge blanket on the grass, gather as many books as Tanner and I can hold {Ty typically squeezes the hardcover miniature of The Hungry Caterpillar tightly in his chubby hands} and we spend an hour sitting in the shade, reading and singing, and enjoying being outside. Just being.

It is amazing what sitting on the grass does for my soul. After a day of making meals, changing diapers, napping one boy while trying to survive the other, attempting to be patient when Tanner looks at me and confidently declares, "No!", stealing hopscotch moments on Pinterest, returning phone calls, thinking of creative crafts, brainstorming Ty's first birthday... sitting outside is just what the mental doctor ordered.

Sitting on the huge blanket surrounded by my two boys, who are wrestling, fingering blades of grass, breaking out into spontaneous song or dance {that would be Tanner}, I take in so much more of life than if I'm hurrying around, driving to the next destination, attempting to
just.
keep.
busy.

Enjoy some photos from recent afternoons on the blanket.
Reading.
Laughing.
Just being
a family!

When I look at these photos, I don't just see my adorable sons. I see moments.

Reading a favorite book. For the zillionth time.

Giggling and tickling.

Ty attempting to wrestle me.

Moments that were made all because of a shady spot on the grass, a blanket, some books, and our family.

Now, if you'll excuse me, it's that time after naps that we venture outside to our blanket and reading destination.

Ty, is reaching for The Hungry Caterpillar, even now :)

Blanket Tradition

2011-09-07T14:27:00.000-07:00

I've said it before but I'm a huge fan of traditions. Especially now that I have my own boys to make traditions and family memories with.

Last week, my wheels started turning as I anticipated this week.

The week that Tanner started Pre-School!

No doubt, we knew he would love it. Love putting on his TOMS for school, although it was sad to see the flip-flops go after living in them all summer, but new shoes represent a new season. Especially when it comes to school.

And he was excited about his cool backpack, which as I packed the night before, realized it was gapingly empty! What does a Pre-Schooler put in a backpack? A snack and.... what else? Well, a snack works great! Into the backpack, down into the dark abyss of nothingness, went his Wheat Thins and grapes, surrounded by... nothing! The days will come when his snacks get pushed to the side, or crammed in a side pocket, making room for books and homework and PE clothes, but for now, I am quite alright that his backpack holds just snacks.

But I digress...

In anticipation for the start of Pre-School, I attempted to squeeze every possible moment of summer out before suddenly Tuesday and Thursday mornings are occupied with drop-offs, pick-ups, and I can bet, an absurd amount of crafts covered with glue and Cheerios.

The last summer moments were poured into trips to the mall to pet the doggies, pool swims, hot dogs, drinking too much Chik-Fil-A lemonade, taking walks around the lake, listening to music and dancing around the house, watching Tanner and Bryan stand-up paddle with Uncle Drew at the beach, and my favorite, sitting on blankets after naps and reading books, while watching the sun melt into the bushes behind us.

There. Went. Summer.

The thought came to me~ starting a tradition before the boys head off to Pre-School, a memory- making- event, one in which they choose with their individual taste, and together we tackle a project together, and have something for years to come.

We'll make a blanket together! Kids love blankets.

Off we went. Singing Veggie Tales Sunday School songs as loud as we could in the car, even Ty attempting to sing along, we were on an adventure to JoAnn's to pick out the perfect fleece material for Tanner's blanket.

And boy does JoAnn's have fleece. Rows of it. Hundreds of options. You name it, they probably have it.

I told Tanner on the way, that he could choose any fleece he wanted for his blanket. It's so important to let kids, as early as they can, pave their own creative, individual path. Yes, as parents, we give them options and healthy choices, but in this setting, I was eager with anticipation to see what my sweet T would gravitate towards.

Because honestly, inside I was praying he'd pick out something really cool. A pattern that would go with his surfing room, maybe something with blue's and green's. For some reason, in the back crevice of my mind, behind the compartment saved for dessert ideas, I vaguely recalled him mentioning something about wanting to choose Spiderman!

Spiderman?

I have no idea where this kid saw Spiderman. But suddenly, he's all about it! Spiderman undies, Spiderman action figures. I'm pretty sure he saw Spiderman when we were cloud-watching last week!

Nevertheless, he walked the aisles. Looking at the colors and patterns. He'd ask me to reach for a bolt up high, take another look, and then decide against it. Until he saw it. At the end of the row. On the bottom. A blue fleece with crocodiles on skateboards.

Yes, I thought. Now, this is cool.

"You sure this is the one you want, bud?"

"Yea, it's really cool!"

Alright then. He grabbed the bolt of fabric, and half carried, half dragged it towards the table, towards the lady who cuts fabric to size.

We were almost there. Maybe two more steps to go. Until it happened.

He spied Spiderman fleece!

And the rest is history. I took one look at his sweet face, the smile that climbed up to his ears, and the fact that he was literally jumping up and down, and I knew Spiderman had joined our blanket project.

Tanner helped me carry the bag of Spiderman fleece to the car, held it the entire way home, and once home, assisted me in laying out the fleece to cut in half, and then lay on top of each other. He even grabbed the can of pins and watched as I pinned the corners, so the fleece wouldn't move as I cut.

He gently instructed me "not to cut Spiderman's face" as I used scissors along the perimeter of the material.

Once the fleece appeared like a Navajo blanket, with vertical slashes along the edges, Tanner helped me tie the knots to complete our newfound tradition. He giggled as we held the fleece and made a double knot. Sometimes pushing Ty out of the way, he was intent on being my big helper to the end. Once in a while he'd get distracted and run to the toy bin, or kung-fu his imaginary friend, but would always come back to check in on our progress.

At last the final knot was tied, and his Spiderman blanket was complete!

Success! The blanket tradition had begun!

That night, along with his typical family prayers, and ending with hopes of dreaming of Santa Claus and ice cream cones, I'm pretty sure he dreamt of Spiderman adventures as he slept with his new blanket.

The blanket that he chose!

That he will love!

That will keep him company on an abundance of future adventures!

It was one of my favorite Tanner memories to date.

Here's to hoping Ty doesn't choose Superman when his turn comes :)

Mama-To-Be Words of Encouragement!

2011-09-01T09:36:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, my sister-n-laws, mom-n-law, and I had the privilege of throwing our sis-n-law, Kristy, a baby shower. She is having their first, a boy, this October, and the family is pretty much beyond excited. Partly because it's a baby, and who doesn't get excited about a wee little munch? And partly because this little guy is a miracle! After miscarrying three times, her fourth pregnancy took, and I think it may have something to do with the stubbornness on the Pogue side :) Regardless, I can't wait to meet my newest nephew and watch life unfold in front of our family.

After a yummy brunch of asparagus egg souffle in petite ramekins, coffee cake, fruit kabobs, iced coffee and peach bellinis, the intimate group of gals laughed over a sonogram game in which we had to identify baby parts. After having two children, you'd think I'd be better at it, but still managed to mix up the boy parts and girl parts. I know!

Before opening gifts, I shared some words of encouragement, a mini devotion of sorts. As I reflected on what to share, I was overwhelmed at the thought that my babies are 3 and almost 1. 'Time flies' is beyond cliche' and when thinking of what to encourage her with, the following words came to mind...

~ Expectations: talk about them. Before the baby comes home from the hospital.
One of the sweetest date nights between Bry and I, was our final dinner as just the two of us. We sat at our favorite cafe in Paso Robles, Berryhill Bistro. Over raspberry chipotle chicken paninis, sweet potato fries with garlic aoli, and ice teas with large lemon wedges, we shared our hearts, fears, questions and wonders of what life would look life from the next day on.
... do we want it to just be the three of us when we get home?
... what about nights? Bryan insisted on getting up, changing the boys, bringing them to me, and putting them down {a rockstar, he is}
... schedules, food, the list goes on...
Talk about what you expect and listen to what your spouse expects. As Bry always says, "Unsaid expectations are unmet expectation." So share away!

~ Be a team
Before the baby, there is just the two of you. That, above all, is your family. The little one is simply joining you guys. Therefore, parent and model in a way that the lil' one knows you love each other. Deeply. Look out for one another. Communicate. Hear one another, and listen through tears, and sleepless nights, and crying for no reason. Compromise. Continue date nights when you are ready, and pour into your marriage. Kids, even babies, know a solid home when they are in one. A home where mom and dad put one another first, after Christ.

~ Keep Christ at the center
Once the little munch arrives, it is easy to think of nothing else. Rightly so, they need you. And between feeding, changing outfits, diapers, trying to find time for you to eat, and surviving on five minutes of sleep in 24 hours, it's amazing that new parents survive. But in the small, quiet moments of nursing or giving bottles, pray over that little angel. Thank God for the blessing they are. Ask God to even now, reveal their little personality, and encourage them in that.
The sweetest times are when we pray over, or for our kids. Together.
Life gets busy. But it's no excuse to take Christ out of the center. We need Him as we do this crazy parenting thing.

~ Laugh. Or else you'll cry.
New moms and dads have a veil of exhaustion over them for the first couple of months. Between trying to sleep, still work {for the dad or both}, it's a sheer miracle the kid gets fed, dressed and napped :) So give yourself grace. Lots of it. Because we are all learning and messing up, and re-trying. And if we don't laugh at ourselves, we'll go crazy. Or looney. Or have multiple meltdowns in one day. All of which I have done. So laugh.

~ Make your own family traditions
I'm a huge fan of family traditions. Partly because of the fond memories I have from growing up in a family that had some pretty fun traditions, but also because traditions cement families and encourage uniqueness.
Getting woken up late at night to be taken outside to look at the stars, hours of fort-making, toad-in-the-hole breakfasts, and putting makeup on my grandma, are a few of my favorite childhood traditions.
Start your own. Aside from the everyday schedule of meals, naps, errands, bath and bedtime, what will you do, who will you be, what adventure will you have that sets your family apart? At the end of your life, nothing could be better than sighing a content sigh as you bask in memories in family memories.

Pogue traditions we've created over the years are simple:
*Summer night swims in the pool once it's dark, with the pool lights on. June bugs flying about.
*Impromptu ice cream outings.
*Errands aren't errands~ they are adventures to be had.
*Letting Tanner {and Ty in the future} sit on the counter and "help" me make chocolate chip cookies. He loves to add the ingredients and lick the spoon after. Then, we surprise friends with a visit, and plate of warm goodies!
* Vacations just the four of us.
*A jar of saved pennies, for "fountain wishes."
And more to come...

~ Know you are loved, prayed for, and not alone!
As a family, we are here for you. As friends we are here for you. When you are tired, we are here for you, to watch the babe for a bit. To offer you a date night. We are praying for you as parents, teachers and models.
We encourage to be the parents God has called you to be. Specifically for this baby. Don't worry about what everyone else is doing, or not doing. If their kid is rolling over, or talking yet. Nursing until they are two, or doing a bottle. Stay focused on your lil' man, and together, the three of you will be wrapped in love, and prayer, and will do great. We love you all. To the moon and back. :)

Sign obsession!

2011-08-26T10:42:00.000-07:00

Sign obsession. I've got it. BAD!

It was when we packed for the move, that I first noticed it. Then at the mall, when I gravitated, no, was pulled by an imaginary force, to the one store, full of signs {and cute clothes}, but really cute signs. And then darn Pinterest took over my world, and now I dream in signs.

There is a sign for every room. In the dining room ~
Whether you come to eat or rest, when you enter our home may you feel blessed!

In the kitchen ~

In our room, hanging above the door~

above our bed~

In Ty's room~

I believe it's out of my love for words and writing, that this sign obsession took root and has now blossomed into a giant fruit tree, ripe for the picking.

If hearing funny, inspiring, personal or loving words, transports me to a specific spot or memory, how much better than to see the words on a sign. On our wall. On my boys wall. Above our bed. It's like seeing a wedding picture with the vows written around it, full of meaning and heart.

As we are living with my folks and saving some money, my mind often wanders to the decorating world of our future place, and visions of new signs occupy my creative spaces. Home Depot calls my name, and with wood planks and fresh, calm color paint {maybe a crazy orange or yellow thrown in}, I head home to eagerly let Bryan know about the twenty new signs I want to make.... lucky him!

Here are a couple signs I can't wait to replicate~

for the living room {we'll Pogue personalize it, and add our own traditions}

our bedroom~

In the kitchen ~

In the boys' room~

The boys' bathroom~

My reading nook~

In our bathroom~
{a great reminder as I get ready for the day}

I'll keep you posted about which signs I actually do end up making later on :)

Tug-of-war!

2011-08-15T13:48:00.000-07:00

My mind is constantly in a state of tug-of-war! Stuff versus simplicity. Materialism versus contentment. New clothes versus a stocked closet. Nice things versus I can't-take-any-of-this-with-me!

It's the idea of new. Not necessarily the trendiest style, latest fashion, or in color. But more so, what new represents to me, which happens to be anything I don't already have.

This struggle with wanting new hits at random times. I'll be shopping at Homegoods for 'Thank You' cards, pass the Bath department, and suddenly my stroll slows, and I'm now standing, staring at rows of towels, in every hue, petting each one, measuring it's plushness, and wondering if it would look great in our next place. Our next place. I don't even know where that is, because right now, I'm not even in that place. I'm living at my parents to save money for wherever that place is. And I'm imagining these towels in that unknown place.

But they are so soft! And I love the bright color! It would compliment the other bright colors in my impulse-buying Anthropologie bedding from three years past! Tug-of-war!

Costco is the worst. The moment I enter the warehouse doors, it's game-time. Eyes focused. List in hand. Determined not to waver from the needs of why we came in the first place. But the darn sample ladies reel me in, and they are having a great price on boardshorts, and goodness, everyone needs a 6 lb. bag of frozen meatballs. Tug. Of. War!

Before Bry left for one of his summer trips, my parents graciously watched the boys so we could enjoy a date night. Our destination was The Irvine Spectrum, where we shared a BBQ Chicken Salad at Cheesecake Factory, and after dinner, walked the outdoor mall. And held hands. And window shopped. I looked longingly at the bags people carried and wondered what was inside. And I wanted. And the tug-of-war began.

I wish money wasn't an issue so I could march into Nordy's right now and stroll out, fashionista!!

The Spectrum isn't the healthiest place for crazy people, like me, with the tug-of-war syndrome. With Barnes and Noble, Anthropologie, and that darn Crepe place, my gluttony takes over.

In a moment of clarity, I imagined myself jumping on top of the ferris wheel, and as it's climbing upward, I'm shouting down to all the little people.

You have a choice. You don't need all this stuff! It won't bring happiness. As soon as the newness wears off, you'll want more. It's just stuff. Return it all now, and go home and play games with your family.

Then the sane Bekah chimes in. About the same time the ferris wheel approaches the ground, and all those little people are now, well, not so little.

I have a choice. To live simply. To ignore my wants. To refuse this internal game of tug-of-war, and believe what's best for me is remembering God's best. The eternal. The relationships.

The moments when I snuggle my boys, and breathe in their curly-hair scents. When I steal the freckles off of Tanner's nose and pretend to eat them. And he returns the favor. When Ty, with all the gusto my 10-month old can muster, attempts to wrestle me, by speed-crawling to my stomach, throwing himself on me, and laughing deep belly laughs until he can't breathe!

My friend Leslie-Ann has one of the most beautiful homes I've ever been in. Her husband built it, and there is no detail unnoticed. Do you know my favorite thing about her house? It's not the cathedral ceilings, or the pink nursery her daughter dreams in. It's not the great room, or dark wood cabinets.

It's that she doesn't have all the latest and greatest furnishings. And she doesn't care. The most beautiful, eternal, precious aspect of her home is that she knows it's just a home. She values her husband and two sweet children far more than her backyard BBQ or granite countertops. She has won the tug-of-war because she values the eternal more than the stuff!

And please don't get me wrong. I am not saying that shopping is wrong. Or buying cute shoes. Lord knows we all need an obnoxious pair of sassy green shoes with an oversized bow on the toe, covered in sparkles! Wait, who bought those? :) It's not the shopping that is wrong, it's the tug-of-war that goes on in my heart when I'm shopping. And the green monster that takes over and tells me I need all these things to make my heart happy. That's the tug-of-war that I'm accutely aware of.

My game of tug-of-war won't disappear overnight, but my prayer is that the more I focus on God's best, His people, my family, and loving others, the materialistic wants will fade into the background, and the peace of eternity will skip to the foreground. The more I taste God's goodness and grace, the less I'm enticed by the earthly sparkles and bling.

I am convinced that Jesus would want me to have a pair of new TOMS though ;)

Bunk Bed Heaven

2011-08-09T14:21:00.000-07:00

For some reason, I have this dreamy vision of my boys sharing a room, more specifically a room with uh-dor-uh-ble bunk beds. Bryan smiles his side-smile at this silly notion. He doesn't understand why I am so stinkin' excited about Tanner and Ty sharing a room. Perhaps because in my idealistic mind, I want for my boys what I didn't experience~ a sibling to share a room with. Not that my younger brother didn't count, but that would have been odd.

So, I'm blissfully intent on having my lil munchers share a room. And they will like it, dangit!

Sounds of laughter, and giggling, and tame wrestling will always be heard behind their door. They will constantly share and never argue. Okay, the latter part is not realistic...

Check out some bunk bed ideas I'm loving...when is the right time for them to share a room anyway?

I'm obsessed with the built-into-the wall bunk bed look!

This is so creative~ it's a crib on top, and toddler bed on bottom! Love!

A couch that turns into a bunk bed~ a bit modern for me, but it's orange, so of course, I'm drawn to it.

Yes please!

Can you handle this? It reminds me of the homes in the Philippines. And yes, it's orange!

I realize it's for a girls room, but I love the layout, especially the storage underneath.

Again, we have two children, not four! So imagine half of this! Love the nautical vibe.

Not sure how safe this is, but it is fantastic!

...and I'm pretty sure, I want the words below framed in my boys future room!

Bekah's Book Review

2011-08-08T08:12:00.000-07:00

As a little girl, I have vivid memories of library trips. Down the street, into the library, up the stairs and around the corner to... augh! The kid section. Dr. Suess covers, and Island of the Blue Dolphin posters smiled at me as I took it all in. I went there probably once a week. To this room full of books. Oversized books. Picture books. Hand-sized books. Mystery. Adventure. Fiction. Non-fiction. Rows of Laura Ingalls Wilder stories stared back at my wide, eager eyes.

It was largely due to having two parents that teach, where my love of reading and books was born. But teaching can only take one so far. As soon as I could read, I was hooked. I couldn't get enough. It was my childhood candy addiction. Pages and pages to be scoured, imagined, dreamed of, and re-read. To this day, two of my all-time favorite childhood books remain James and the Giant Peach and The Secret Garden. Not only because of the worlds I escaped to as the stories were read, but mostly because the particular copies I owned were worn, with faded covers, and uneven page edges. It felt like it had been read by other children, hundreds of years earlier, and therefore, it made my specific copy that much more adventurous and sacred.

So thank you, library, for awakening one of my deepest loves~ reading. Thank you for holding Sylvester and the Magic Pebble on your shelf. And Shel Silverstein. Phantom Tolbooth and Nancy Drew. And yes, even the popular Babysitter's Club escape reads. You didn't simply carry pages, and bindings, and words in that special room, with the children's book-cover posters on the wall, you stirred imagination and passion for what could be found inside the bindings of each cover.

As an adult, I probably have have 4-7 books on my night-stand at any given time. Some that I read faithfully every day, and others I browse when I'm letting my clay face mask dry. Some to benefit me spiritually, as a leader, as a wife, as a parent, and others that are purely for escape or charm.

In honor of my love for reading and in dedication to that quaint childhood library room, I will be doing regular book reviews. If you share a love for pages, and bindings, and words, I'll do my best to review a current read, and whether or not you should waste your time or money on it!

Without further adieu, I'll highlight just one of the books sitting on my night-stand. It's one of my favorites because it is not the typical book I would reach for, nor is it an easy read. It requires much thought, chewing on words and phrases, pondering what is being conveyed, then soaking it in prayer and verbally exhaling it out of my everyday actions. It's a parenting book, and it has rocked my world!

Spiritual Parenting, by Michelle Anthony.

Only having read to Chapter 4 thus far, this book has completely taken the little parenting puzzle I know, or have attempted in my three measly years as a mom, shaken it in a huge jar, dumped it upside- down, and forced me to pick up the pieces and create an entirely new puzzle. A parenting puzzle designed only for Tanner and Ty, with the center being God's grace, and surrounding that center, Bryan and I holding hands, heads bowed.

In a nutshell, I have learned this: Christian parenting is not a list of do's and don'ts...
Don't have sex until you are married.
Do read your bible every night.
Don't curse.
Do be obedient always.
Don't question God.
Do listen to your parents. Yadda yadda yadda. Yes, those are all good things. But they are not the best!

Do's and don'ts can mistakenly attempt to teach children to be perfect.

Instead, Spiritual Parenting encourages each parent to authentically live out lives that love Jesus, offer grace, show daily forgiveness, healthy communication, and provide a protective home to ask questions and think. Our role as Christian parents is not to raise Christian robots, but to be real, and show who Jesus is in our actions and words. This, our children will watch, and notice, and learn from.

This, and allowing the Holy Spirit to work on their hearts. Is the book saying that we sit back and pray that the Holy Spirit saves our kids, and we can just fast-forward through the bible stories? No! But it does encourage us to really think about how we present Jesus in our homes to our kids... do they only hear about Jesus on Sundays at Sunday School, and the five minutes after, when we ask them what they learned as we walk to the car? Or is it a daily, lived out, real testimony of our faith?

There's a snippet, and I'm only getting started. I love it! I recommend it. The book makes me want to intentionally live out Jesus to my children. Every. Day. And then invite them into the bigger story, their own story, of Christianity.

I hope you enjoy it. If you grab a copy, please let me know what you think. Everyone has differing opinions, and I delight in hearing them all :)

Happy reading. Happy page-turning and cover holding. Happy ...

Spiritual Parenting!

Finger Paint Fun

2011-08-01T13:43:00.000-07:00

Bryan got home from High School Water-ski Camp and plunged full force into making up for lost time with his boys. He literally walked in the door and threw on his board shorts, jumping in the pool with Tanner. Then off to play on the ground with Ty, {or more so chase our 9+ month- old monster}. Baseball, wrestling, cheerio-snacking, you name it, it was happening. And the best part, was that I sat back, glass of wine in hand, and watched. Watched daddy and son magic before my eyes.

It's a precious thing. To watch my husband toss Tanner in the water, and walk Ty along on his tiptoes. It's like watching people fall in love. But better. Like the result of true love magnified a hundredfold.

And amongst the activities was finger painting. Tanner donned an old button-down shirt of Bry's, instantly becoming his favorite smock, and painted his little heart out.

And he mixed colors. Red. Yellow. Green. Blue. Swirling to make circles and squiggles and three-year old handprints. It was art at its' finest. But mostly, it was a glimpse of his creativity. His thought process. The way he didn't mind if lines smudged or colors mixed.

And I learned as I watched, that I've misunderstood creativity. So much of what I think creativity to be is twinkle lights and tulips resting on the edges of mason jars. I visualize hand-made cards and Anthropologie pillows. But there is a world beyond my imagination. And it belongs to a three year old named Tanner. Standing in front of easel, running his fingers along the paper, outlining imaginary dragons, and panda bears, and ice cream cones, art was made. My heart swelled at the outcome, as every parent's does, and his painting was promptly laid on the table to dry. Later it will be hung in his room as his first finger painting masterpiece.

I'm sure there will be more to come, more finger painting projects. But this first memory made with goopy paint, paper, and his creative mind, will set the tone. Thank you, T, for refreshing in me a creative reminder. That everyone creates in their own way. So paint, little man, paint. Swirl and draw, and run colors together. Paint what your dreams bring to the surface and find joy in it. Dribble paint on your daddy's smock and worry not about the green goop on your face. For you are creating, and that my son, is magical.

Real Simple's Blogger Contest!

2011-07-21T14:39:00.000-07:00

Last month I had a rare moment to sit down and actually read my favorite magazine cover-to-cover. Real Simple. Long after the days of Seventeen, Premiere, Cosmopolitan... my life was made complete by this magazine. I am a forever fan and subscriber. Real Simple. Ah! Just the magazine's name relaxes my shoulders and brings a content sigh. Real Simple. The title conjures up images of neatly organized rows of fresh, white, cotton pods. All is well in the world when reading Real Simple.

And there on page 16, these words caught my eye: The first ever simply stated blogger contest!

Yes, Real Simple, you have my attention. Read on.

...'write a blog post of no more than 300 words that answers this question: Who is the person you are most surprised to be friends with?'

I thought for a moment, and the light bulb blinked on. Coleen. My neighbor. It's her! ...

So here it is, my less than 300 word, blog post entry about the person I am most surprised to be friends with. It did my heart good to soak in this for a bit. And, it was secretly fun to enter my first ever blog contest!

She's 50. I'm 30. She coaches High School volleyball. I stay home and pour into my two young sons. In her spare time, she golfs, and makes a mad martini. Give me a free day, and I'm reading or decorating, margarita in hand! No two people could be more different. What solidified our friendship, is the common wall our homes share.

It began as neighborly mailbox chats and driveway waves, but became a quick friendship. At first, we politely exchanged brownies and rice krispy treats with a knock at the front door. Almost overnight, our back sliding doors became the meeting spot.

Since then, we've traded countless eggs, swapped must-reads, had girl nights to watch The Bachelor, eaten obscene amounts of chocolate, and offered decorating tips.

But deeper than sharing ingredients, novels or decorating advice, we've opened our hearts to one another. She has shared about personal pain, and the emotions that follow. She has loved my boys like they were her own. She's cried with me.

I, in turn, have voiced my struggles with life and parenting, with the sweet trust that every day brings new joys and celebrations.

She is part of our family. I find comfort in knowing Coleen is next door, should I need a listening ear, or extra hand. And she knows I am there for her. To listen when she is having a lonely moment, or delight with her in a day spent with her niece and nephew. I've learned that friendship is not in the meeting, but in the maintaining.

Just yesterday, she was off to the store, and asked what I needed. "Just creamer."

When she brought it by later, along with a surprise of some chocolate yummy-ness, I reached for my wallet, but she was already halfway out my back door.

"Don't worry about it," she waved over her shoulder, "that's what neighbors do."

No, I smiled, that's what friends do!

Movin' on out...

2011-07-18T10:21:00.000-07:00

It is probably one of the most stressful seasons at the moment. Not bad stress, just busy stress. Summer equals crazy with a youth ministry schedule ~Hume Lake, Water Ski Camp and everything else in between.

July specifically equals, hmmmm... our lease is up in a month. Let's move! Where? I'm not quite sure. But surely, we can find a stellar deal out there for less than what we are currently paying, so let's heap some added craziness on our schedule and move!

Allow me to paint the picture of our July, and the beautiful blessings that are scattered over the month:

July 1st: Hey, let's move!
July 2nd: Awesome Women's Ministry meeting, which concluded with all the ladies offering to pack my house up while I was at Hume Lake the following week with our Junior Higher's. Humbling? Yes! Overwhelmingly blessed. Yes! Blessing #1.
July 3rd: Celebrating Tanner's 3rd birthday party. Mostly, celebrating who he is and the joy he brings!! Huge blessing #2
July 4th: Spent the day BBQ-ing with my hubby and boys, swimming, walking the trail and ending the beautiful evening, sitting on our blanket watching the fireworks overhead. Blessing # 3.
The following week: Impromptu swim dates at my folks, time with friends, couch dates with hubby, packing, organizing, grocery-shopping for Hume Lake, not sleeping because Ty baby decided he was over it! All of it... blessings! Even though some are covered in tears and a sleep-deprived fog!
July 10th-16th: Hume Lake Camp with our Jr. Higher's. At the last minute, one of our counselors was unable to counsel, so Bry decided to fill that spot, which meant I was staying in a cabin with the kiddos by myself, which meant, insanity! So my amazing mom-n-law came with us. It was a week of getting to know some pretty cool 7th and 8th graders, seeing great friends, walking around the lake, good talks with my mom-n-law and seeing God reveal Himself to Bryan in a much-requested way that only He can answer. On the 11th, we celebrated Tanner's real 3rd birthday and he was greeted with "Happy Birthday's" from all over camp! Blessings!!! Oh wait, did I mention, Ty's first two teeth popped up that week? Yes, still blessings! I've lost count with all the blessings by this point!
July 16th: {Yes, the same day Bryan drove back from Hume Lake} A dear friends wedding! One in which God turned beauty from ashes. Blessings!
An unexpected bout of food poisoning later that night. Blessing! Not for the roller coaster tummy, but because every time I get sick {seldom}, I am incredibly thankful for my health. Puts it in perspective!

And here we are today... Of course, sprinkled over all the daily activities, is the fact that we are still moving. Into my parents, for the interim. But still moving. And I hate moving. More so, I hate packing. But I can't even describe the blessing of coming back from Hume to see my house, mostly packed in boxes, and neatly organized in the garage... all because 11, unselfish friends, gave up their Thursday evening while I was at Hume, to help our family. A true demonstration of people showing up for one another. There were no words of gratitude I can utter other than 'Thank You.' I feel so loved.

And moving, I'm finding, is cleansing too! Out with the old, in with the new. Get rid of sweaters and toys and unnecessary things! It's just stuff, for goodness sake! As much as I value closure, and everything having it's place, this packed-in-boxes, in-between season, fits my life for the moment. Because nothing is permanent. And I can honestly say, I am okay with it. Because I know what's around the corner is amazing. And it will be worth the July craziness. The moving in with my folks until we find the ideal place. The fact we don't sleep because Ty decides he wants to put a full grill on his bottom gum. The living in suitcases, and multiple trips, and not getting quality family time. This is all a July season. And blessings still abound.

August will bring rest. Clothes put away. A locked storage unit, tucking our home goods safely behind it. Family time. Saving some money. Preparing for Tanner's first year of Pre-school. So many blessings. And those boxes will be a reminder that I am always in transition from one place to another, one season to another. It's the state of my heart in that transition that takes this stressful month of July, and makes it an adventure of blessings!

Love. What's Your Language?

2011-07-06T10:45:00.000-07:00

Love languages and the topics surrounding have surfaced in multiple conversations recently. I realize the 5 Love Languages is a familiar book. The concept of how we specifically love others, and how we desire to feel loved is simple concept, but when lived out, can truly be life-changing! After all, don't we really just want to be loved?

So, yes, the topic has circled. With a dear friend. On a double date. With my mom and mom-in-law... . Quality time? Words of encouragement? Acts of service? Gift-giving? Or physical touch? Obviously, we know what most men say! But truly, this whole love language thing has got me thinking....

How nice would it be if we all wore chalkboard signs {in a cute necklace-y way, not in the awkward, over-sized, sandwich board-wearing way~ like the guys on the corner, dancing and waving the Quizno's Special sign!}? And what if on that chalkboard sign was written how we desire to feel loved?

Wouldn't life be easier if you knew your friend, she really just wants you to buy her a freakin' gift? Or, that your brother, truly values when you share what a specific difference he makes? Or that a co-worker values a hug? Or that your boss, he really wants to be verbally affirmed of his managerial role? It would take a huge chunk of guessing, assumptions, and stress out of relationships if we knew how to speak other's love language to them.

And the irony is, one's specific love language may oftentimes not speak love to another. Simply because encouraging someone verbally makes you warm and fuzzy inside, doesn't necessarily make someone else feel the most loved. For all you know, they feel valued when you make them dinner, or offer to watch their kids.

Take my mom for example... the lady buys gifts for others like nobody's business. She'll be out and see this for someone in their bible study, and that for her friend in Colorado. I think yesterday she bought a treasure for the postman! And the other day, we were shopping for Tanner's party, and she was carrying a coffee mug with numbers crawling all over it. "It's for the math teacher at school," she smiles! Uh-huh? She loves tucking gifts away, knowing it will make that person feel loved. Gift- giving, it's the way she loves others.

Now, if I give her a gift, that's great and all. But if I call her to grab lunch and catch up, that speaks love to her. Quality time displays love in a tangible way to her soul.

It took me a while to figure this out about my mom. Mother's Day, her birthday, St. Patty's day... whatever holiday would be around the corner, and the anxious bug would bite.

What gift am I going to give her? What would she love? Deep sigh. Attempting to squeeze creative juices out ...

So one day, I simply asked her about it...this crazy obsession with gift-giving and what in the world she wanted me to get her. And it was then, that I learned she could care less about receiving a gift, but truly feels loved when people give her quality time.

So back to my chalkboard sign vision. It will just make life simpler. And more honest. And help us love each other better. I'll go first...

My love language is quality time. If you call me to catch up and get together, well, you just made my day! I don't care if we gab over a walk, decorating session, or dessert, the fact that you initiate, makes me feel loved. Makes my day. Maybe my week, if the dessert has anything to do with chocolate. If you desire to know my thoughts, fears, and dreams, that speaks love right to all 5ft 1 1/2' of me! Spending quality time together equates doing life together, and to me, there is no better way to feel loved or valued. To be thought of or invited somewhere {even if I can't make it} whispers love.

So whether it's words of encouragement, physical touch, quality time, acts of service or gift-giving, give love abundantly in your special way, and intentionally allow other's to receive their valued love language!

Get the chalkboard sign out. Your turn. Honestly. Please share. I'd love to know how you feel most loved...

Love. What's YOUR language?

Trip to the Dentist

2011-06-23T16:14:00.000-07:00

Ahh the dentist. I know, most people hate going. Just the word alone. DENTIST... Shudder.

I don't mind the dentist. Probably because I loved the dentist I grew up going to!

Dr. Wise. He was the sweetest man in the world. He had a calm voice that instantly transported me to a tropical island. And the dental hygienists that worked in the office were so nice. And so happy. Like everyday was Christmas. And they all looked like they'd walked out of a Clinique ad~ fresh and natural looking. I even babysat for one of them once.

They must love their job, I'd thought.

Then my Senior year of High School rolled around and each Senior was assigned the task of Senior Internship. Which translated, 'whatever you want to be when you grow up, go do 30 hours of it, and report back.'

So, naturally, I chose to shadow the lovely dental hygienists at Dr. Wise's office.

Day 1 I showed up, green, but eager to learn, and hopefully gather make-up tips on the side!

Dr. Wise asked me to observe a filling.

All was fine. Until the long tube came along. And the blood that flowed along the tube...

The next thing I knew, Dr. Wise was standing over me, and I was carried to his office.

And let me remind you, that was Day 1! I still had 29 1/2 hours of internship to complete. Which I did. But I had become the comic relief in the office!

Hey Bekah, we have to do a filling, do you want to watch? Snicker, snicker!

Very funny!

Needless to say, my profession as a dental hygienist had been made very clear! I'm actually thankful that I passed out that day, instead of going to dental school and paying $3 million in student loans, only to learn that I would not have been a great dental hygienist... I would have been on the floor half the time!

I didn't mind the orthodontist either. And I saw them both. A lot. Because I had one of those mouths that is too small for all my teeth. So in addition to getting my teeth cleaned every six months, I made regular trips to the ortho for molds for my teeth. For oral surgery. To remove my four un-erupted eye teeth. Yep, un-erupted. Doesn't that sound dangerous? Back to my too-small mouth for all those teeth. So, let's just yank out four of her teeth that haven't come in yet? Good idea! Ugh! I had that surgery twice~ one time for the top teeth, and another for the bottom teeth.

And then there were trips for braces. And new wires. And retainer fittings. And 'what sticker am I going to put in the retainer?' Hey, it was cool in those days. And occasionally, I still wear my really cool retainer, with the butterfly sticker in it. Bryan loves it :)

Well, today I went to our new dentist. New because it's been a 1 1/2 years since I last paid him a visit. And not because I was avoiding him. I even filled out the self addressed postcard to be mailed out six months after my last cleaning. And it's been a year and freakin' half! Six months went by and I waited by the mailbox for my dental cleaning reminder. And another six months went by. And then it was winter, and I was cold and tired from standing by the mailbox. And then the holidays hit and you know how that goes. All of a sudden another six months had flown by. And, well, I'd had it with waiting!

So I called. And I could picture the receptionist on the other line. Botoxy lips. Perfectly taut skin. Tan. Sitting in her swivel chair, hugging her body, with one knee up. Sort of like a Victoria's Secret model, but the ones that advertise clothes, the ones with the small shorts and baggy, off-the-shoulder sweater... one that slightly resembles Penelope Cruz!

{My verbal voice} Hi, um, this is Rebekah. I was in a year and a half ago, and I never received a reminder about getting my teeth cleaned...

{My inner voice} I'm taking the bull my the horns, lady, and calling YOU to make the appointment. You probably postpone all your clients in hopes that huge cavities take over their mouths.

Victoria's Secret Receptionist: Uh-huh...

{My inner voice} Uh-huh? Don't you mean to say, "I'm so sorry you didn't receive your reminder postcard. Silly me. I'm sooooo sorry. Let me get you in, oh, how about tomorrow?"

{My verbal voice} My last name is Pogue and my husb-

VSR: -Oh, and your husband's name is Bryan? I can get you guys an appointment in, let's see...

{My inner voice} Did she really just say Bryan's name that fast? It's as if she had our information glued to her computer, as though we were the next name on her reminder call list...

VSR: - Yes, I can schedule you guys in two months..

{My verbal voice} Two months? You have nothing sooner?

{My inner voice} What? Now it's one year and eight months! All my teeth could fall out in the next two months! A possible cavity could turn into a potential root canal!

VSR: Nope, that's the soonest. Yawn.

{My verbal voice} Fine. I'll take two late morning appointments, please.

You get how this was going....

So I went today. And sure enough. Victoria's Secret Receptionist was looking as botoxy and taught and tan as ever. And I would have sworn her mesh, off-the-shoulder sweater had a bathing suit top underneath it. But she smiled, and I grabbed the latest issue of OK and took a seat.

And the dental hygienist was rather sweet. And the tropical beach canvas hanging high on the wall was rather nice. And the dentist... well, he shook hands like Mr. Limpet.

But I had no cavities. So, I guess it wasn't that bad, for a place I only have to visit every six months... or year and half for that matter!

And at least I didn't have to observe a filling :)

Unexpected Encouragement

2011-06-16T13:04:00.000-07:00

My mom, being the gift-giver that she is, brought over an adorable green onesie for Ty declaring, WHAT HAPPENS AT GRANDMA'S, STAYS AT GRANDMA'S, along with a treat for Tanner, a delectable snack in the form of chocolate for me, and I'm sure something else that I can't recall at the moment... simply because her love language is gift-giving and it brings her so much stinkin' joy! Thanks mom!

Later that week, Ty was sporting his new onesie and I was absentmindedly changing his typical third poopy diaper of the morning. And it wasn't even 9am.

Snap. Snap. Snap. I undid the three buttons and reached for the diaper. Ready to lift his chubby Ty doopa {that's what we lovingly call the booty in our home} and slide the clean diaper underneath. And then I saw something. And I stared. And then leaned in closer. And stared more. And my mouth opened in a small O... and then tears dropped. Little waterfall trails down my cheeks that kept coming. This is what I saw...

you are doing a great job!

just thought you should know it

It was the most unexpected, encouraging, precious sight. And I stood there, holding Ty's plump legs in the air and cried. And smiled. It was a pure gift. The perfect words at the least suspecting moment. Another diaper change. Another mindless task. But it left a mark on me at that moment, and for the remainder of the day.

I am doing a great job. I am doING A GREAT JOB. I AM DOING A GREAT JOB.

Well, thank you, lil' onesie for making my day.

Amazing how a couple of words can leave such an impression. All day I beamed. I was doing a great job.

Go on nature walk with boys. I am doing a great job.

Get Tanner a snack and Ty some puffs to munch on. I am doing a great job.

Change another diaper. Take Tanner potty. I am doing a great job.

Fix lunch. More mustard please. Fix bottle. More food please. Wipe faces. Wash hands.

I am doing a great job.

It was incredible how suddenly the smallest, everyday details of my day came into focus and were valuable. Intentional. Because the little details are important when I do them for people I love, especially my boys.

And it got me thinking... I want unexpected, encouraging words written on my clothes! I mean, how great would it be to slip on a sweater with the words, YOU ARE CREATIVE AND INSPIRING stitched on the hem? Or step into a pair of pants and read YOU MAKE THE WORLD BETTER JUST BY BEING YOU on the inseam.

Words are a powerful force. They have the ability to make our days shine, or shatter our moods. And if a silly onesie can remind me that whatever I am doing is great, how much more can verbal words, written words, a small hug, or intentional smile mean to someone else?!

Every day someone pops into my mind. A friend just had a baby. Someone's hubby had a job interview. Her kids are at home sick. We all have people in our lives with something going on. So I'll make a dinner, and bring it over, and hold that little joy, and congratulate the parents. I'll call to say I'm praying for direction for them, and am eager to hear the outcome. I'll offer to give my mom friend a break so she can get errands done, so the sickies don't have to venture out. I'll encourage, validate, listen, hug, smile....

Try it. The next occasion someone comes to mind, pick up the phone. Pen a thoughtful note and pop it in the mail. Simply let that person know you are thinking of them. I guarantee it will leave an unexpected encouragement in their day.

In the meantime, I'm stitching those words on every article of clothing. Every sock. Scarf. Every tank top. Pj's and undies...

you are doing a great job!

just thought you should know it

Changes

2011-06-01T13:34:00.000-07:00

Recently I found myself saying these three phrases way too often: "I'm tired." "I'm done." "I'm frustrated." I was tired because I'm way too much of a night-owl, and Bryan and I often have our best talks {couch dates} til late, or, we are catch up on our favorite shows... does anyone else cry at every episode of Parenthood? :) And, going to bed at midnight, and getting up at 6am to our precious little morning boys does not make a fun Bekah. Which leads to the often quoted, "I'm done" and/or "frustrated." Needless to say, I've made some changes, because only I am in charge of how I manage my time, view the day, and whether or not I'm getting adequate sleep.

And the physical, spiritual and mental changes I'm intentionally making are these:

~ I'm protecting my days at home more. I tend to be the opposite of the stay-at-home-mom and am always out having adventures with the boys and friends, but recently I notice if Ty gets his morning nap at home, he's a happier Ty. Sure, I get a bit antsy, but Tanner and I take nature hikes in the back, or make cookies for someone. Being home every other day helps me get things done around the home that otherwise get neglected. It's better on my soul when we have our "down days" at home.

~ I'm power-walking, doing Pilotes at home, and cutting back on dessert {don't gasp in shock, I'm just cutting back, not giving up my desserts altogether... goodness, that would be the end of the world!} I love the way I sleep better after exercising, how my muscles feel the "good" sore, and the increase in energy is priceless. And yes, the occasional Kinect Dance-off with my sister-n-law is a workout too! When I walk, I choose places that feel like a mini vacation: beautiful parks, the beach, places with overhanging trees and grass hills as far as the eye can see... being in nature does wonders for my soul. And where better than to talk with God, and walk, and listen, than in His creation?

~ I'm putting more things on the coffee table, so to speak. Bryan and I heard this analogy a couple of months ago about "putting things on the coffee table" when communicating with someone else. The idea is that the coffee table is a safe place to throw words, thoughts, remarks and not react to them right away. Later, I can go back and pick those things up from the coffee table and choose what is truth and what is not. This has done wonders for my marriage, communicating with family, and for my own confidence. Instead of letting every word penetrate me, I now park it on the table and think about it, instead of simply reacting. It's taught me to clarify the intent of one's words, and choose how to handle it from there. A simple analogy with life-changing results! There is such freedom in communication when things are put on the coffee table.

~ I make it a priority to go through a book with a friend, grab coffee, make dinner, whatever it be, but with a life-giving friend once a week or every other week! Friendships are a gift and when I spend time in the presence of others who value God's grace, speak truth, sharpen my character, I naturally become a healthier me.

~ I read a lot. If I had a free day to myself, you would find me at the beach, book in hand, ice tea in the other, immersed in pages... I can hear angels singing at just the thought of it. Reading is heaven. I'm going to add a new aspect to my blog and do book reviews, but at the moment I'm reading, Heaven is for Real, Bittersweet and The Girl Who Played With Fire... all different, and thought-provoking, and fabulous. Not only does this challenge me to grow and learn, but it's good me time to unwind.

~ I'm not making decisions based on guilt, obligation or "shoulds", but instead on adventures, teaching moments, refreshing times, and fun! This means saying 'no' at times and being confident in that no, and saying yes to the moments that matter.

~ For now, those are the changes that I'm making. As well as little ones, like using Grapeseed oil, and trying tinted moisturizer instead of powder. And giving that boxed make- your- own Macaroni Grill Dinner at home a try. Oh, and I'm trying to say 'yes' more instead of 'yea.' I'm thinking it will help me sound more like a grown-up! I am still working on the going-to-bed- thing earlier but that's okay... couch dates with Bry, an episode of Parenthood, and frozen cookie dough ball in hand are sometimes worth the tired mornings! And erasing the phrases, "I'm done," and "I'm frustrated," are good changes indeed!

Chocolate Pots de Creme

2011-05-18T20:36:00.000-07:00

Chocolate Pots de Creme. Now tell me you didn't just smile saying this, let alone, seeing the picture! This is one of my latest fave desserts to make. Super easy. Amazingly yum! And you can't go wrong with any dessert eaten out of a cute ramekin...

About a year ago, I found Le Creuset ramekins in my favorite apple green at Homegoods and proceeded to buy every one they had, so when I do get an itch to make this dessert, I can feed all of Orange County in the process :)

Ingredients

9 oz. high quality semisweet chocolate, chopped {I use Guiradelli's large chocolate chips}

1 1/2 cups whole milk

1 1/2 cups heavy cream {yep, it's a very non-fat dessert, but worth every bite}

6 large egg yolks

5 tablespoons granulated sugar

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 tablespoon confectioners' sugar

Directions

Place the chocolate in a blender. Whisk the milk, 1 cup cream, egg yolks, granulated sugar and salt in a heavy-bottomed saucepan over medium heat. Cook, stirring constantly with a heateproof spatula, until the mixture is thick enough to coat the spatula and almost boiling, 5-6 minutes.

Immediately pour the milk mixture over the chocolate in the blender. Cover and hold the lid with a thick kitchen towel; blend until combined and smooth, stopping to scrape down the sides of the blender {I don't recommend licking the spatula at this point~ it's still too hot. Yes, I tried it} as needed. Divide the chocolate mixture among ramekins or small cups and refrigerate until set, about 2 hours. {I always make mine the night before I serve, just to make sure it completely sets.}

Whip the remaining 1/2 cup cream and the confectioners' sugar with a mixer or in the blender until soft peaks form. Top the chilled pots de creme with whipped cream. {Chocolate shavings on the whipped cream also add an extra fun touch~ you can't go wrong with the Trader's Pound of Milk Chocolate... anything left over, well, that's your call!}

Enjoy!

"I thought you had him!"

2011-05-11T14:13:00.000-07:00

I have now had five days to pull myself together, process, and can now blog about Saturday night. The night we lost Tanner. Yes. We lost him. On Balboa Blvd. In Newport Beach. It was the world's longest 15 minutes ever!

Allow me to back up... I arrived at my brother's new place that he and Jeniece will reside at as married folk, in Newport Beach. It's adorable and homey and a beach bucket's throw from the sand. You get the point. We will be camping there all summer. I came straight from a photography class (more on that later) to relax before helping get dinner ready for my mom and grandma in honor of Mother's Day.

Bryan arrived shortly after with our boys, freshly napped, snacked, and cute as could be. Tanner wearing his new shark shirt and Ty, in a Tanner hand-me-down shirt, proclaiming, 'Lock up your daughters!' We chatted for a bit, and then Bry and Drew went to find a parking spot in busy Newport and quickly grab something at the store. On their way out the garage, Tanner chased after, asking if he could go.

"Hurry," I told him. "Go with them."

Jeniece and I proceeded to gab about anything and everything the next ten minutes until the boys returned.

Bry took one look in the room and asked, "Where is Tanner?"

"He's with you," I said.

But his eyes already said it. He was not with Bry. "I thought you had him!"

The next 15 minutes are ones I hear about on the news and see on movies. They are in slow-motion and fast-forward all in the same sprint. Out of body.

The four of us literally bolted onto the streets and took off in different directions.

"Have you seen a little boy about this tall? Curly blond hair... he's wearing a shark shirt? Have you seen him?"

Neighbors came out of their houses. People started joining the search. Someone yelled about calling the police.

And all the while my mind is racing... He knows his full name. He knows his age. He can tell people who he is looking for. Running. Another block. No Tanner.

I know he won't go on the main boulevard because he has to hold an adults hand when there are cars. I know he won't go by the water, cuz it's too cold. Another block. No Tanner.

I know we will find him. I know he will be okay. But then the ugly voices came...what if someone grabbed him? What if he is crying and we can't hear him? Another block. No Tanner.

And then, Bryan runs by... THEY FOUND HIM! Four blocks down, the police had been called by a sweet lady and her college daughter who had come across a little boy walking down the street, sippy cup in hand, curly mop, wearing his shark shirt and looking for "daddy and Uncle Doo."

My heart! My boy was found. My Tanner! We grabbed him. Gently enough not to scare him, but strong enough to smell him and frame his little body with ours. He was home!

After thanking the sweet women and hugging every neighbor that had helped search, we walked back to the beach house, praising Jesus! Sweet Tanner had been found.

The rest of the night was a celebration. Yes, for my mom and grandma. But more of a celebration that Tanner was where he should be. With our family. Complete. I couldn't stop staring at him. Thinking about his funny quirks. His obsession with closing doors. That Guess How Much I Love You is our book. That he loves dip-dip with everything. That coca-cola is a special treat with Papa. That every night before he goes to sleep, I kiss him and tell him, "You make my heart smile." The list goes on.

On the drive home that night, we praised him for doing such a great job telling the ladies his name, and who he was looking for. We coached him on coming back in the house, should that happen again, to tell us that daddy and Uncle Doo had already left, instead of going on a hunt by his lonesome. Bryan and I even laughed about how polar opposite we are in emergencies... he freaks out and goes into search mode, and I get very calm, and think rationally and almost turn unemotional. Weird.

Once home, I laid in bed with Tanner for an hour. Playing with his hair. Praying for him. Crying silent tears over my first born. Thanking and praising Jesus that he was safe, and with us.

And I was reminded of this: he is not mine. He is God's little boy. And I too, am God's little girl. But I feel like I've wandered a bit myself. Down the block. Doing my own thing. Good things. But being busy. So it was not only a wake-up call as a parent, but as a daughter in Christ. When was the last time, I laid on the couch and poured my heart out to my Heavenly Father? Or cried to Him? Or read His book? Or sat in awe of His sunset?

I fully believe circumstances happen in life to either awaken us TO God, or make us numb and push us away from God. I want to run towards Him, yelling my name, recognizing Him from afar and feeling at home in His embrace. Just as Tanner was to us. That day we found him. On Balboa Blvd. Sippy cup in hand. Curly mop. Shark shirt. Ours.